butterfly ▸ vhope

13 :: Empty

"Hey,"

"Hey, hyung,"

I smiled at the broken and emotionless boy sitting on the hospital bed. It was a week later since the incident and Taehyung woke up two days ago. His parents were unable to make it here but they called in everyday to ask about him. They talked with him over the phone today but Taehyung was still in that emotionless state since he woke up.

"Do you want something to eat?"

He shook his head and remained staring outside the window. His complexion was pale, his eyes empty and his lips cracked. Paired together with the blood drip on his side and the bandages on his arms, he looked like a glass, easily broken and hard to fix back.

I sighed as I handed him the bowl of bibimbap I made. He received it without any complaints and started to eat it slowly. It was slow, but it was progress. At least he was eating, unlike the days before when he would decline food and water and was forced to get a drip instead. It pained me seeing him like that, but it was a part of moving on on his part.

"Hyung, I finished. Could I get some water please?"

I smiled and nodded before receiving the bowl from him. Pouring a glass of water, I saw that he was staring out the window again from the corner of my eye. Shaking my head, I turned and handed him the water, watching as he took it and took a big gulp.

"When can I leave the hospital, hyung?"

"Soon, Tae. The doctors just want to make sure you're fully well before discharging you,"

He nodded and I smiled sadly. Sure, he and I were in our early twenties, but he still seemed like a little kid who can't wait to go home. His haemophobia wasn't helping him either since he had to do blood drips for the past few days.

He was staring out the window again when I got back from the canteen. I had bought two croissants and two cups of hot chocolate for us both for tea break. It pained me to watch him like this. It was rare he would get that empty look in his eyes and it would often last for a short while. But it was obvious that the empty eyes were here to stay this time.

"Hyung, can we go for a walk? It's so stuffy in here,"

I smiled and nodded. Carefully, I helped him up from the hospital bed and supported him as we made our way out of the room and into the bustling hallway of the hospital.

We were in the intensive care unit, the same level as the psychology unit. I watched as Taehyung's face scrunched up when he saw psychologists walking down the hallways. I frowned. It has always been his dream to be a psychologist, but now he was uncomfortable being around psychologists? Wow, what Ellie said made a huge impact on him.

"Hyung, let's go back. I don't feel like walking anymore,"

I nodded and led him back to the room. It wasn't far since we didn't even leave the level yet. The moment I helped him onto the bed, he laid down, turned to one side and pretended to sleep. He was purposely trying to hide the fact that he was uncomfortable so I left him be. He needed his time and space and I understand that.

"Tae, I'm just going to pop by the doctor's to see when you are able to be discharged, okay? Get some rest. If you need me, your phone is just on the bedside table,"

No replies from him, I sighed and left the room. His doctor's office was just down the hallway so it was quite near. He had two doctors: a head doctor and a psychologist. Obviously he won't be meeting the psychologist anytime soon.

It was a short trip to and fro since the doctor was fairly free today. He said Taehyung can be discharged tomorrow, latest by the day after if he still needs to be observed. I thanked him and met with Taehyung's psychologist. She said she had observed Taehyung from the sidelines for quite some time and she gave her verdict that he might be suffering depression, which is deadly if not treated properly. She said it's best to keep him occupied at all times and check on him once a while. Thanking her, I left and headed back towards Taehyung's room.

It was silent when I walked in and Taehyung was nowhere to be seen. The toilet door was locked so I guessed that he might be in there. Sitting down, I took the day's newspapers and started to read. About fifteen minutes later, I got a little curious as to why Taehyung was in the toilet for so long. Without thinking much, I stood up and went to open the toilet door.

What greeted me was the sight of Taehyung sitting there, eyes empty, the bandages on his arm ripped and fresh cuts painted his arms. I gasped and pressed for the nurse while Taehyung just stared off into space with no emotion and no recognition of anyone in the room.