Dear Camila,
I visited the graveyard today. Not just any graveyard though. The graveyard your parents are buried. They aren't my parents but when they were alive I treated them like they were my own. They were such nice people. When I first met them I right then and there finally understood why you were the way you were. Your personality must be genetic.
When your parents died you went back into a huge depression. I remember thinking to myself that youwere gonna push me away again and that I was gonna have to spend my days alone again for a few months, but you didn't. You didn't push me away. You pulled me closer because you needed me and you were in no position to deny it.
Your parents died in that car crash on highway I90. They were heading back from a very short vacation to a friends house. You sat at the dinner table, deep inside a book. It was one of those nights that we had to ourselves. Dinah and Normani offered to watch the twins while Ally offered to watch Camren and Sofia.
I was seated on the couch, scrolling through my Facebook feed when I got an incoming call. I picked it up. The officer on the other end explained that he had trouble reaching you. Your phone had been dead for an hour so no wonder. So he decided to reach the partner of you, which was of course me. He explained what happened and what was soon to happen. I told him thank you and hung up.
I don't think you had even noticed that I was on the phone. You were that deep into the book you were reading. You only ever noticed my presence when I touched your shoulder as I sat down.
"Camila," I started "I love you"
You smiled and gave me that smirk that kills me every time. "I love you too, Laur"
I sighed "I just wanted you to know before I told you what I am about to tell you." I told you.
I told you about the accident, my conversation with the police and the place we were too pick up the stuff that had survived the accident. You listened intently to me as I spoke and only cried after I finished my speech about how much I care for you, how much I loved you and how much I was sorry you had lost the only thing left in your life.
You cried for hours on our bed. I laid there right next to you. You had your face buried deep in my neck, taking sharp intakes of breath as I held you. Your warm breathe was hitting my neck.
After you finally settled down and your cries became so quiet, you turned your head a bit to look at me.
'You lied" You had said "I still have you left"
I never told you this, but I cried after you fell asleep. I got up from our bed, went into the bathroom and cried as I took a shower. I loved them too. And I loved you. I felt like I had lost something just as much as you had.
Sincerely,
Lauren Jauregui
