Mine *don't read: being rewritten*

Chapter Twenty-Four

(Riley's POV)

Have you ever felt so mad or sad or scared that you were sick to your stomach? That's how I felt when I saw Hunter push that girl. I trusted him, more than I've ever trusted anyone. It took a lot to let myself do that, but I did because I truly believed that he loved me - that he wouldn't hurt me.

I ran out of there before even giving him a chance to explain himself.

Now I lay on my bed, staring up at the ceiling. But then the memories flood back to me. All the times I've been in this bed with Hunter. The times that I've lied here in Hunter's arms and felt safe; felt like he would never hurt me.

I take an extra blanket and pillow from my closet that I haven't used in years. I make myself a little pallet on the ground and I lay down. It's three in the afternoon, but I don't care. I lay down and close my eyes. I ignore my phone, which is blasting "Kiss Me" by Ed Sheeran, meaning it's Hunter calling. I ignore everything and drift off to sleep.

I wake back up at six. My phone is still ringing. I end up turning it off and slipping it into my pocket.

"You okay?" Sam asks when I get downstairs. I shake my head. "What happened?"

"I saw Hunter push a girl today. Roughly." I sigh. "It's just - I trusted him. He promised he would never hurt me, and by that I guess I just figured..." I trail off.

"Did he just like randomly push the girl or did he have a reason?" She asks, raising her eyebrows at me. Sam's giving me the look that my mom used to give me when I wasn't thinking something through. Or when I was being stupid.

"It looked like she was leaning in, but that doesn't give him an excuse to do that."

"Rye, I know this is sensitive for you and everything, but do you think that you're maybe, sort of, overreacting?" Sam asks carefully. "Because that boy loves you, there's no doubt about that." As soon as the words leave her mouth, her phone rings. She looks at it, then to me.

"It's him."

I press a hand to my forehead and take a deep breath. Then I nod, telling Sam that she can answer it. I move closer to her, so I can hear what he's saying. "Hello?" Sam says.

"Sam, oh my God, please tell me she's okay." Hunter's talking really fast.

"Riley's fine, Hunter." Sam's eyes shift to mine before she continues. "Why do you ask?"

'Sam!' I want to yell but I can't because then Hunter would want to talk to me but I don't want to talk to him - I can't talk to him.

Hunter takes a breath before he begins. "My ex is in town. Why she's here, I don't really know. But she tried to kiss me, so I pushed her away. Riley saw and I guess now she's just scared or mad, and she has every reason to be. I just wish she would answer her phone." Sam makes a pouty face at me when he finishes talking.

"Just give her some time, Hunter. She just needs some time to cool off, you know?" Sam explains to him.

"Yeah, I get it. Just tell her that I love her for me." Hunter takes a shaky breath and I know that he's crying. That's how he breathes when he cries.

God, it's hard to be mad at him or scared of him or whatever I'm feeling towards him when he sounds so vulnerable. And the look he gets on his face when he cries, he just looks like a lost puppy. And his eyes... His eyes get so blue. Such a bright crystal blue. Especially after he's done crying, but there are still tears swimming in his eyes. All you want to do is hug him so close and hold him so tight and just tell him that everything will be okay...

In that moment, I almost rip Sam's phone from her hands to talk to Hunter - my Hunter - but I don't. I let that moment pass. I let her tell him that she'll see him soon and I let her hang up.

"What now?" Sam looks at me.

"Three days. Three days without talking to him. I'm gonna let myself cool off a little, and in three days, I'll call him or go to his apartment or whatever and we'll make everything right." I nod, and so does she, and I go back to my room.

I lie down again, this time I don't move from my bed. I lie there and think back to those memories of us, lying here, together. "Maybe I should call him," I say out loud to myself. But then I shake my head. Three days isn't that long, he'll be fine.

I fall back asleep while having flashbacks of Hunter and me. I remember the time I told him that I cut and when I called him because I was freaking out and he came over and then I told him about Adam. All those times he would just hold me.

I need to stop thinking about Hunter; it's making me miss him too much.

I turn my phone back on a week later. I still haven't talked to Hunter. I have like thirty-eight missed calls from him and thirty voicemails. As much as I want to hear his voice, I don't let myself listen to the voicemails. His voice is probably shaky and it will probably crack a lot and he won't sound like my Hunter.

I just picture him pacing his room, his phone pressed to his face; tears sliding steadily down his face. One hand was probably tugging at his hair. He would bite his lip when I didn't answer, trying to choke back a sob.

Thinking about him like makes me want to cry. Now I need to hear his voice. His strong, steady voice. His accent is still heavy; we've only been back for about a month.

I finally pick up my phone and click on his name. I press my phone to my ear and it rings five times before going to voicemail. "Hey, uh, it's Hunter. I guess I can't make it to my phone right now, but," he stops and laughs quietly, "but I'll get back to you as soon as I can."

I remember when he made that. I was with him. I told him that he needed a new voicemail, and he made one. I wanted to mess him up, though. He did it seven different times, and laughed when I tried to make him laugh every time.

I call three more times, but he won't answer. I guess I figured that he'd answer right away, but that clearly isn't the case. I decide to listen to the last voicemail he left me, which was from almost an hour ago.

"I love you, Riley Ann." His voice is shaking like crazy, and I know he's crying.

I listen to the next one. "Riley Ann," his voice is shaking. "Please, I need you to tell me not to do it. Please. Tell me not to do it." I bite my lip, trying not to let the tears fall.

I'm downstairs in ten seconds. I tell Sam that I'm going to Hunter's, and I'm out the door.

I didn't think to grab my keys, or anything at all, so I'm running to his apartment complex. I don't know how I managed to get there in fifteen minutes, but I did. I know that the elevators would take to long, considering my Hunter could be dead, so I run up the three flights of stairs.

I only stop to catch my breath when I'm right outside his door. I double over, breathing rapidly. Then I picture Hunter hanging from his ceiling fan, or on his bed, laying in his own blood, dead.

I find the door to be open, so I run in. Alex is sitting on the couch, watching some stupid show. Maybe it isn't stupid. I don't even know what it is, but I'm not here to see what dumb show Alex is watching; I'm here to make sure my boyfriend is still alive. "Alex! Where's Hunter?" I ask. He seems surprised to see me.

"Back in his room." He shrugs, and then stands up. "Why?"

"You have to keep an eye on him, Alex!" I shout, running back to his room.

"Why? Is he five or something?"

"He might as well be. People with history of self-harm are more likely to relapse when," I stop talking when I get to Hunter's door. I open it slowly, hoping he'll just be in his bed. But he isn't.

"GODDAMMIT, HUNTER!" I yell in anger, not at him, but at myself for not listening to him. For having my phone turned off.

I walk over to him, and kneel down by him. He's sitting against the wall on the floor. Hunter's eyes meet mine. "Stop," I whisper as he drags the blade of the scissors across his skin. He drops the scissors.

"Alex, go get a washcloth," I command, not breaking eye contact with Hunter. Alex leaves without saying a word.

"Hunter, it's okay. I'm here. You're going to be okay," I assure him. "I love you." He doesn't reply. "Can you see me, babe? Can you hear me?"

He's still looking at me, but he's not saying anything. Before I can tell him anything else, he passes out.

Blood is still flowing from the open cuts on his wrist when Alex comes back. I lay Hunter down, and rest his head in my lap.

"Okay, now I want you to call an ambulance. Hunter needs to get to a hospital." I'm trying to stay calm but Hunter just passed out; I can't stay calm. I take the washcloth from Alex as he presses his phone to his ear.

I don't hear his conversation with the operator. I'm not really paying attention. Tears are sliding down my face as I press the washcloth to Hunter's wrist, carefully, as if to not hurt him. I put all the pressure on the cuts as I can after a second, realizing that he could bleed out. That's why he passed out.

"Hunter, please. Please be okay." I sob.

"He will be." Alex says, sitting by me. "Here, let me do this, okay?" He takes my hand from Hunter's arm and replaces it with his own.

I try to control my sobbing, but I can't. I lean forward, my face inches from Hunter's.

We hear sirens a few minutes later. "Riley, take a breath," Alex says.

I nod, but I can't calm down. "Okay, when they get up here, I want you to ride in the ambulance, because if he wakes up, he's gonna want you. I'll meet you at the hospital." I nod again.

In the ambulance, the paramedic replaces the washcloth with gauze. She asks me basic questions about Hunter, and I'm able to answer them all without hesitation.

They put Hunter into a room, and I try to follow, but they won't let me in. "Please," I say, practically begging a nurse. "I have to be in there." I'm still begging when Alex shows up.

"Rye," he says quietly. He wraps his arms around me, and basically drags me to the waiting room.

"Sit," he commands. I do as he says, and wipe my eyes.

"How do I stop crying?" I ask him. Alex sits by me, and wraps his arm around my shoulders.

"Take a breath." Breathe in. "Now let it go." Breathe out. "He's going to be okay." Breathe in. "I promise." Breathe out.

"I'm going to call Hannah because I have no idea how to calm you down." Alex tries to laugh, but it comes out as an awkward croak. His throat must feel as tight as mine is.

"I don't need Hannah. I need Hunter," I mutter. "I don't know why I didn't call him before. I'm so stupid. Alex, why didn't I call him? This is all my fault." More tears well up in my eyes, and they spill down my face.

"Stop blaming yourself for this," Alex says.

"But it's my fault. If I would've just called earlier, or had my phone on or something we wouldn't be here. Hunter wouldn't be here!" I exclaim, putting my head in my hands.

Alex has his phone to his ear when a doctor comes out. "You can go in now."

"Is he awake?" I ask, standing up.

She nods, and I run past her to Hunter's room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N

Feel free to rant about how much you hate me in the comments for this chapter.

It was really hard to write because Hunter is my favorite character that I've ever created and I just love him and ugh

Please please please vote and comment I'll love you forever yay

I love you guys(:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~