The Angel's Ambivalence [Naruto]

Not So Sweet 17

"But I'm not giving up. I'm just giving in."

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Minxie's POV

Summer, August 2

Today's my birthday. I'm officially seventeen years old.

I wish I wasn't.

I sighed, ripping the page out of my journal and crumbling it up. I had been trying -unsuccessfully- to write a proper journal entry since I had woken up. Needless to say, I was failing. Words completely escaped me. If I couldn't even talk to anyone, how could I write?

I huffed, shutting my journal and shoving it into my bag. What a great way to start my seventeeth birthday.

After Scarlett had provoked me into caring again, I spent the rest of the night with Ryuu. Both of us had completely forgotten that when the sun rose the next day, we'd both be seventeen years old.

There once was a time when I was excited for my seventeeth birthday. It was right after I had reunited with my former teammates and sensei. As I unpacked my belongings and failed at cleaning my room, I had smiled to myself. Ryuu would finally meet my friends, and he'd grow to love them, just like I did. He'd form unbreakable bonds with them, and when August 2nd came around again, we'd be able to celebrate our seventeeth birthday in Konoha, surrounded by the people we loved. I had even planned to get a message to Itachi, so we could spend a portion of our birthday with him as well. It was supposed to be the best birthday we'd ever had.

But today was nothing like the birthday I had imagined. Itachi was gone, and our village was destroyed. The friends I loved were the friends who had manipulated me.

Everything was different, and I hated it.

I'd never felt like my own thoughts were suffocating me. I'll tell you right now: it's not a pleasant feeling. I felt like I couldn't breathe. There wasn't anything wrong with my lungs. No, I couldn't breathe because I felt like the weight of my reality was suspended above my throat, ready to crush it.

I shook my head, standing up abruptly. I couldn't stay in this tent any longer. It'd drive me nuts, and I was already way too close to insanity for comfort.

My feet took me to an empty training ground, and I decided that maybe a training session was exactly what I needed to clear my mind. I rummaged through my ninja pouch for my iPod. When I found it, I switched it on and placed it on shuffle. I counted along to the beat, beginning my work-out.

... 7, 8, 9, 10...

I did another round of ten sit-ups, music blaring in my ears. My earphones were plugged into my ears, allowing me to drown out the world around me.

... 1, 2, 3, 4...

Before I could get to five, I saw a hand waving in front of my face. I sighed, realizing it belonged to my brother. I paused my music, pulling my earphones out and looking up at him.