Before Her

Jane 32

Jane
Rush hour, my mind was in rush hour right now, and honestly, I don't think it would ever stop, at least not for a long time.

It took a while for me to finally register what had happened.
Newt had kissed me.
He had kissed me.
The tall, blonde haired boy, my first friend in the glade had kissed me.

Even now, as I sat next to him, with my head on his shoulder, listening to his steady breaths it was still hard to believe what had happened. The kiss had been soft and sweet. I could still feel his lips against mine, his hand pressing lightly against my waist and I smile at the memory.

Sparks had flown during the kiss. And I didn't mean literal sparks, more like memory flashes, like flipping though a camera, sparking one after another. Newt had been in all of them.

The flashes went as quickly as they came. One after another, replacing each one as soon as the other ended. There was one with Newt smiling at me, his hair shorter than it is now, and looking younger. Then there was one with him holding my hand, he was wearing a hospital gown, I was wearing one too. He whispered, 'It's going to be okay.' The next one was us running down an eggshell coloured hallway I didn't recognise. Then one with Newt looking down at me with deep concern, brushing away a tear from my cheek. And the the last one, it had started with me hugging Newt, I couldn't see him, but I knew it was him. He smelt like apples and sweat and I had to stretch like crazy to hug him. He pulled away, he looked like he did now, but his hair was a little longer. He pressed his lips one my forehead before looking at me and saying, 'I'll see you soon' and then he disappeared.

Once again as I had said, Rush hour. A hundred memories, a thousand feelings, a million thoughts, one person.

The memories made me wonder. Obviously I had known him before the glade, how and where was still a question. Part of me wanted to find out, the other didn't. That part was stronger. I didn't want to know about my past, I didn't want to know why we were here. I liked it here, even though the others wouldn't admit it, we still had absence of comfort here in the glade. I liked being with the other gladers, they were funny and sarcastic, but sweet and sensitive as well. Most of all, I liked being with Newt.

Even though the others would never admit or accept it, this is home now.

And as I thought this, as I thought of the present, of the glade and of Newt and all the other gladers, I realised that the memories that had come to me, the flashbacks, were slipping, slowly slipping away, away from me. My mind went wild for a minute, desperately trying to remember the the colour of the hallways we had run in, the colour of the gowns we had worn, the face of the boy who had been with me in all those flashes, but, who was the boy?

~~~

In the early hours of the morning, the sun was rising slowly, casting faint shadows across the glade. The glade was at its most peaceful state. I smiled as the warm glow of the sun bathed my skin, brushing away the morning coolness.

Carefully, I walked through the crowd of sleeping boys, around to the other side of the homestead, to the entrance of the infirmary. As I walked, I stretched my arms and rubbed them on the sides of my neck. My neck was stiff and aching from leaning my head on Newt's shoulder all night. At the rate of the bad cases nightmares, thrashing, tossing and turning we both had when we sleep, I was surprised to find both of us in the same position from when I fell asleep, my head on his shoulder, his head on mine, our hands intertwined, sitting crosslegged with our backs against the wall.

The infirmary was the same, the smell no longer bothered me, it lingered here and there. The med-jacks were slowly evolving, slowly. The tables were still bird nests, but there were no longer bandages everywhere, instead, there were big plastic bags at the back of the infirmary. Smiling to myself, I walked around to each table, grabbing all the bottles of medicine and different types of bandages and putting them back in their kits and drawers.

An arm wrapped around my waist, I gasped at the contact. I felt my back pressed against his chest gently. He spoke, a soft whisper, 'I knew I'd find you here.' I relaxed immediately when I realise I recognise his voice.

I turn around to face a smiling blonde haired boy. I slap his chest, 'I think you just gave me a minor heart attack.'
He lets out a small chuckle and gives me a small kiss on my cheek which results in heat rushing to my cheeks. I turn around and continue sorting through the mess on the tables. Newt helps me silently, well at least as much he can help one hand, a smirk on his face every time I sneak a glance at him. Before the infirmary starts filling with other med-jacks, Newt tells me he has to meet up with the other runners, and gives me a hug before walking out.

The rest of the day passes by smoothly, well, until the runners got back. The minute I see Minho, I knew that he knew. His eyes seem to find me as soon as I spot him come out of the map room. Immediately, his face lights up into a cheeky, sly grin, the same one he gives when he's about to do something crazy.

I knew there was no use hiding, so I lifted my hand and gave him a small wave. In return, he gave me a big wave filled with enthusiasm. In a few strides he reaches me. When he finally reaches up to me, I knew he was in 'I told you so mood'. He was stretching up to his full height, looking down on me while giving me the same smile.

'Hi Jane.'
'Hi Minho. How are you?'
'I'm good, actually I'm more than good. But let's not talk about me, lets talk about you and Newt!'
'Shuck Minho, can you be anymore louder?'
'What? Everyone thinks you're together already, there's no need to hide anything.' He flings his arm around my shoulders and steers me out of the infirmary, towards the kitchen.
'Did Newt tell you?'
'Oh, no, you know I just guessed,' Minho says casually with a flick of his wrist.
'What how'd you know?'
'Oh Jane,' he says ruffling my hair, 'I've known Newt much much longer than you have, I can read him like an open book. I knew he liked you, it was only a matter of time, and when he walked into the map room this morning he was unusually happy. No lie, you should see the speech he gave us this morning, the normal speech he normally gives us, which is all serious and "Run out, map the maze in your head, avoid grievers, don't die" today he was all chirpy happy smiles. And you know it's hard not to notice when Newt smiles, he's like this cute little kitten that needs love and when it is given it he's the happiest, cutest kitten out of all the kittens!' As I watched Minho compare Newt with kittens, I couldn't help but remember when he had told me that Newt was the cutest boy in the glade when he was drunk, and I immediately started laughing. It was one of those laughs that knocks your breath right out of you and doesn't let you stop until after like, 5 minutes at least. Minho kept nagging me and asked me why I was laughing, saying he wanted to laugh too, which caused me to laugh harder. When I finally calmed down, and wiped the tears away, Minho had decided not to talk to me, although I knew he would burst any minute.

Suddenly, an alarm sounded, it was different from the supply alarm, this one was louder, more annoying. It shook the whole glade, giving it a small tremble the same way it did when the walls of the maze opened or closed.

Gladers walked out of the infirmary like it was no big deal while I silently tried to calm by minor heart attack. My heart slammed against my chest again and again, harder, not faster, but harder and louder. The middle of the glade was crowded, all pushing and shoving trying to get a better look, and I smiled, realising that I was looking at what had happened on the day that I had come, but in a different perspective.

I manage to push my way through the group of towering boys until I am standing close to the edge, looking down at two closed doors. Is this what it was like for the boys when I came up that metal box?

Newt was standing on the other side opposite to me. He looked at me, giving me a small smile. He knew what I wanted, what I was hoping for, a girl. I was hoping for someone who would understand me, the way no boy can. I was hoping for someone who was the same as me, someone who wouldn't make me feel like an outsider amount the others.

The blaring of the alarms stopped. Newt gave me an encouraging smile before I was gently pulled back, several boys moved to the edge, including Newt, the leaned down, crouching before leaning over to dig their fingers into the small gap that had opened when the alarm had stopped blaring, between the two doors and pulled it back.

also (IMPORTANT) so I've kind of written before her like a prequel right? So I want this story to be able to fit in so that you can still read the maze runner like it happened after this book so please whatever happens at the end don't be mad at me, but I really want it to fit with the maze runner. So please respect my decision at the end of this book, I haven't written the ending yet and I'm still deciding.
So thanks for all the support and voting and the lovely comments