Hearts revival (a follow up from the North and South tale)

return to Milton 12

We've been more than a month now, the sea is every bit as beautiful as it has been before and even the weather has been very kind to us. We are taking it easy as it is perfect for Mary but it is slowly making me fidgety and restless. I hope Mary does not notice but being so close every day, nearly all day, of cause she notices after a while. 

"Miss Elizabeth," she says, "I feel confident to stay on my own now until the treatments are over. Why don't you return to Milton and carry on with the teaching?" 

I shake my head, "I couldn't, I would feel awful leaving you here on your own."It hasn't consciously occurred to me but I think she is right, I do want to go back. I would miss her greatly tho but I also miss the hustle at the Mill and Uncle and admittedly, John. Strange that one should ever grow tired of beautiful beaches and the sea. It does make me realize, that absence makes the heart grow fonder. I know that when I'm back in Milton, I will miss the sea once again.

"Really, Elizabeth, you know that I wouldn't be on my own, we have made friends, have we not?" She is right, we have made friends among the other patients. Mary likes one girl in particular, Silvia a shy, fragile girl. Mary has been able to help her built up her confidence and they have become friends. I'm a little jealous but Mary can have more than one friend, it doesn't make her like me less? I hope at least. I'm torn. If I go, she might become really close friends with Silvia. Awkwardly I address my fears. Mary laughs, a hearty laugh that brings the tears to her eyes, as a matter of fact afterwards she does rather cry than laugh. "Oh Miss Elizabeth, how could you ever think I would stop liking you, I love you, you have become like a sister to me and nobody could ever, ever take your place!"  Now it is I who tears up. 

"I'm sorry Mary, I have not been able to let anybody into my heart since my parents died." She hugs me. 

"Would you like to tell me about your parents?" She asks me. I shake my head. I feel bad about it, as she has told me how her mum died but I still can't allow those memories. They are hidden, hidden away deep down. Allowing them to come to the surface is too painful.  

I do struggle a bit tho when it is time to say goodbye.  I have to tell myself that she is still there, not gone and will eventually return to Milton and also I've got to look forward to seeing my uncle, the children and of cause John. So I make sure Mary will be financially provided for, then I hug her and leave for Milton.

As soon as I'm back, I have a messenger sent to the Thornton household, to let them know that I have returned and that I would like to resume the teaching. 

The children are excited to have me back. At some stage, I ask them: "So, has Mrs. Thornton been good to you?" I am very curious and also a little anxious. I do hope she has, otherwise, I will probably feel guilty. Quite a few children lift their hands, I chose Johnathan, one of my more rowdy students to tell me. If there was anything not right with Mrs. Thornton's teaching I'm sure he would have no scruples telling me. 

"She is actually not too bad, the old hag," he says with a grin. "Johnathan," I say, "I'm pleased you and her got along alright, but would you please not call her an old hag it is very degrading." In order to stop him from replaying something rude, I announced that I have brought chocolates for everybody. That worked, as these children don't get chocolates very often and they are very excited and joyous, including Johnathan who forgets to retort in a rude way. I am not very strict, I believe that the key to earning a child's respect is to love them firstly, and to respect them in return. So far this has worked quite well.

The commotion has attracted John, suddenly he is standing in the  door. I haven't seen him since I'm back and seeing him so sudden, nearly has me faint. "Just coming to see if you alright Miss. Elizabeth?" He seems concerned. 

"I'm sorry Mr. Thornton if we have distracted you, I'm afraid it was my doing, I've brought chocolates and the children are simply exited."  He smiles. It warms my heart! Even if it is still a small smile, I believe it may grow in time. I do hope I will be able to make him laugh one day. 

"I believe the children are very pleased to have you back," he says and I'm thinking; I hope you too! He nods once more and leaves the room. I am due to visit his house this same afternoon for I would like to thank Mrs. Thornton myself for stepping in with the teaching.

When the moment arrives I am quite nervous. I think it is important that the mother of the man I so very much esteem, approves of me. There is a possibility that John will beat the house, although normally, he would still be working at that time. I'm being brought into a salon where I meet Mrs. Thornton. "You have returned early," she states after we exchange the usual greetings. I am not at all certain if she is scolding me or if she is simply just stating the fact. She looks and behaves as if she is not very pleased with me. It is a little unnerving, I cling to that, which John has so kindly revealed to me about Mrs. Thornton approving of my ideas and so on.

She informs me, that the teaching has been very invigorating and that she has indeed enjoyed herself. I don't think anybody but Mrs. Thornton can disclose such information looking at you as if she is greatly displeased. I will have to look passed the expressions. I thank her for stepping in for me and I gift her with a beautiful necklace, the pendant bears a very unique piece of amber coming from the sea. I believe she is touched. I have also brought a gift for John along but I am unsure whether he will like it. It is an empty medicine bottle that I have filled with some of the sand from the beach and some very small shells, as well as some actual seawater. The bottle is resting on a wooden stand a man made me from driftwood. I thought it to be very personal at the time. With the possibility in mind that he might not appreciate my gift, I pass the present on to Mrs. Thornton. 

Mrs. Thornton looks at me for a while, then she says, "My son had to suffer a lot, it is never easy for a mother to see her child suffer so! You make him smile Miss Elizabeth and that is something I appreciate a great deal."  Again she has me feeling unnerved. It is time for me to leave so that I may process the meeting and that which has been said. I agree with her that should I ever need somebody to teach, I will contact her. While I bid her farewell she actually smiles at me. I think this was a successful meeting, sadly John never came, but who knows what kept him, I just hope it wasn't my presence.

Needless to say that I have been passed Higgins's home to pass on information about Mary's well doing. I have also brought gifts for Higgins and the children. They are all very happy to see me and I believe it is not only because of the gifts. Higgins is overjoyed and stunned that the doctor's believe that Mary will be able to lose the cotton in her lungs. After a moment, he quietly mentions: "If only you had been around when Bessy was still alive." I agree, if only!