jian //drunken mistake

chapter 27

   ///kians pov///

  "Monday you can fall apart

Tuesday, Wednesday break my heart

Thursday doesn't even start

It's Friday I'm in love!!" my voice cracked a little at the end as I sang along the my favourite song by the cure. it came on the radio and instantly perked me up. I can't wait to see jc and say I'm sorry and shower him in kisses and have make up sex!¡¡!¡::))

   that is, if he takes me back...

   Funny, I never even thought of that possibility. it's more likely that he'll never speak to me again above all other possibilities. I just want to hold him again. talk to him. I've been drunk more than not over the past few months, just to avoid his image and my regret. I wish I realized how stupid I've been before now. how could I be so fucking idiotic to let Cameron fucking Dallas tell me how to live my life? tell me my lifestyle was wrong? to tell me that I'm straight. man, I've known I liked guys for a while now, and he completely brain washed me. that's what the pressure of stereotypes and media will do to you I guess...

   but this is completely my fault.

    someone can't make you feel a certain way without you first giving your permission. I gave Cameron my permission to do this. without even knowing.

   I'm that weak.

   but I'm going to change that. for me. for my life and friends. for jc.
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   I arrived on the outskirts of town just over 20 minutes ago. I've been looking out the window, looking at different things that remind me of the guys.

  "there's the ice cream shop me and jc went to on our first date.." I said to myself quietly, sighing after. I heard a shrill beeping noise coming from somewhere in the car. frantically, I shifted my sights to the gas tank percentage. "HOlY shItt I am so low."

   I quickly pulled over to the nearest gas station, hopping out onto the hot  pavement to fill the tank.
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   "that'll be 40.55 please!" the girl behind the counter smiled at me, showing off her snake bites. i handed her my credit card, which I magically found under a dirty pair of underwear in the backseat earlier.

   I turned to leave, not really looking where I was going because I was obviously to absorbed in unwrapping the twix bar I had just bought, and I bumped right into someone, knocking me backwards slightly. I looked up to apologize but couldn't say a word. all I could do was smile
at the face I hadn't seen in so long.

   "shit, bro I'm sorry I should really watch where I'm- kian?"
*****
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH I wasn't even gonna do a cliffhanger until it just popped up in my mind. you all think you know who it is don't you.

so I'm gonna try and update more so that I can finish this story. you deserve that much at least. when I'm done I'll either do a sequel or just write a new jian fic. who knows

so anyway don't forget to vote, comment, follow, share, smile, tell your fam u love them, bye