feel. → jacksepticeye

t w e l v e

"Faster! Faster!"

"I'm going as fast as I can!"

"Oh my god, Bryony!"

I furiously button-mashed the controller, my tongue poking out in concentration as I furiously tried to make Ellie steer the horse in the right direction to avoid getting shot with hunting rifles by bandits who were dotted around the icy map.

"No! Not Callus," I frowned, watching as the horse took a nasty shot to the back leg and rolled down a cliff with a heavy thump. "Poor thing."

"Hey, are you hungry?" Jack asked, and I paused the game to look at him and nod enthusiastically, my stomach following with a short growl at the mention of food. "Haha, okay. I'll order some Chinese in because I'm too lazy to cook."

"Fair enough," I agreed, standing up and stretching my aching limbs. About ten minutes after I came into Jack's apartment, the crash of the drugs hit me and I was left a snivelling mess again, but at least he was here to hold me through it. He thought I just went through another episode of sadness, although this one was created by chemicals that were not of the human body.

"What would you like?" Jack questioned, and I pressed a finger to my lip and hummed in thought before looking up at him.

"Egg fried rice and chicken balls, please," I asked eagerly, and he nodded before walking out of the room for a quiet conversation with whatever store he was calling. I realized that once again his mobile was buzzing on the couch, and I took this smoment to silently thank him for using the landline rather than his personal phone.

I guessed his password on my second try; it was the date we started dating. How typical and hopelessly romantic of him.

I scrolled through some old texts he'd received from Signe and was glad to see that they had started thinning out to maybe once a week or every other day in their frequency, which gave me the idea that their friendship was wearing out.

One text, however, caught my attention and I squinted before moving the device closer to my face, almost as if I couldn't believe what I was reading.

Signe: Jack you must know how I feel about you at this point

Sean: yeah I had an idea but I didn't want to say anything about it

Signe: I really do like you, you know

Sean: look, Signe, I really like you too, but not in that way... you know I love Bryony :/

Signe: I know, I know, but she still seems like a bit of a control freak

I didn't have time to see how he responded as he was already padding back to the front room, so I locked his phone and put it back in its original position. Jack smiled warmly at me and I smiled back at him, tucking my knees up to my chest.

"Are you cold?" Jack questioned, watching as I pulled my hoodie over my knees.

"Yup. It's freezing!" I complained, and he chuckled at my response before getting up to whack the heating up a few degrees before rejoining me and holding me against his side.

"Don't worry, it should warm up soon. And we have our food to look forward to, don't forget," he reminded me, and I huddled up against him with a hum of approval. Though I was happy in this moment, I could feel the sensation of self-hatred and I just wanted to curl up so tight that my insides crushed and I couldn't feel anything at all. Why did I feel like this?

To distract myself, I requested we put some American Horror Story on, which he gladly agreed to, and then we got through one and a half episodes of Coven before there was a ding of his doorbell and he got up excitedly. There was a man dressed in uniform carrying two plastic bags, and he exchanged it with Jack the second the money was handed over.

We wandered into the kitchen, pulling out plates and cutlery where we then divided the food before taking it back and watching the series again. My favourite character was definitely Madison, as she reminded me of myself so much with her attitude and her witty responses.

By the end of our fourth episode, we'd eaten almost twice our body weight and were physically unable to move off of the sofa. Instead, we cuddled up right there, threw a fluffy blanket over us and drifted off into sleep.

* * *

"Hey. Hey, Bryony! Wake up," Jack shook me, and I was startled into snapping my eyes open. I realized that there was a warm moisture on my cheeks, and it took me a moment to put the pieces together and realize that I'd probably been crying in my sleep. "Are you OK?"

I rubbed my thumbs under my eyes and nodded, gasping for breath. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm OK."

"What were you dreaming about? You were saying some pretty crazy stuff," Jack told me, raising both of his eyebrows to show his surprised response.

"Oh, right, um, I was just dreaming that someone was trying to take you away," I muttered, suddenly feeling very silly, although if that were a real life situation, I'd be cutting throats left and right. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"Nah, it's alright. It's probably best if we go to sleep in an actual bed anyway," he decided, sitting up and stretching.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"About three in the morning," Sean said, smiling dopily before swinging his legs off of the sofa and taking a hold of my arm. "Come on."

"Hmmm," I moaned in complaint, burying my head into the position that he'd been lying in.

"Do you want a kink in your neck when you wake up?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at me. I mumbled something incoherent and allowed him to guide me to bed, feeling absolutely and utterly exhausted after all that had happened through the day.

"Goodnight, Jackaboy," I hummed, snuggling up in the cool bed sheets as he crawled up beside me and sprawled out across the mattress comfortably and hugged his pillow. "I love you."

He smiled at that before answering, "I love you too."

* * *

obiously some chapters are going to be normal and chill like this one because i really want you to see that Bryony reallyreallyreally does love jack and that they do have a meaningful relationship but then behind the scenes she's a fucking psychopath