Sometime 1987
She doesn't know the day; barely even knows the month or the year. That's how bad things have gotten, how bad the drugs are, how fucked up her life is.
So when she's sobbing hysterically against a car with him holding her up (or maybe she was holding him up; maybe they were holding each other up) after she had run out of his house and left Lindsey and their band staring at each other, she isn't particularly surprised.
He's resting his hands on her face now, wiping her tears away with his thumbs and making him look at her. She shuts her eyes against it.
"Steph, please look at me."
She shakes her head, but he waits. Finally, she gives in.
"You know things haven't been good since..."
"It was ten years ago, Lindsey!" She shouted and she was sure the whole block could hear her. She was sure she didn't care.
"Shush, baby, I know. Things were never the same after that. He was one of my best friends and you were...you were my girl, you know?"
"You stayed in a band with us for ten years."
"I know. I tried. My friendship with him recovered, but you and I...we just got worse, angel." He was crying again too and she hated him for it because he was the one doing this.
"We're okay..."
"We are killing each other, Stephanie. We cannot save each other and if one of us doesn't walk away, we will both die together."
She looks at him with a sad smile, "hey, isn't that how tragic love stories end?"
He shakes his head, "we're not tragic."
"No, just hopeless." They both laugh a little.
"Listen to me, Steph. You are amazing. You can be so much more than this, but you have to get better. I just...I can't be the one to make you better. I've tried for so long..."
She nods and looks at him; she kisses him gently, "and I love you for that. I love you."
"I love you too. Always. No matter what." He kisses her back; kisses her again.
"But you gotta walk away?"
"I gotta walk away, baby."
She nods, "then go. I won't watch."
He gives her one last, long look. She doesn't know when she'll see him again. She doesn't know if she'll even live long enough to see him again at the rate she's going. She can't stop spiraling out of control. She is the reason he has to walk away. She wishes they had never joined this stupid fucking band.
She doesn't watch him go.
May 1997
She ran towards him as soon as she walked in the door and he met her in the middle. His arms went right around her waist and hers went around his neck and he was so happy to see her that he actually spun her around like in one of those ridiculous romantic comedies. They had only seen each other once since the inauguration, and it had been to discuss the upcoming concert they were about to start rehearsing for.
He set her down gently and tucked some hair behind her ear, "hey gorgeous."
"Hey Linds," she smiled at him.
"Miss me?"
She laughed and rolled her eyes, "not at all."
"Yeah, I didn't miss you either," he said with a smirk.
