Adopted by Phan-a Dan and Phil Phanfic

Chapter twenty - Neon lights

A/N: Yes I am aware how many recent chapters are named after food. Sorry not sorry! (At least this one isn't)

~Phil's pov~

"Dan?" I called into the flat. "Yeah?" He had assumed the browsing position, stuffing himself into the sofa crease. I sat down next to him. "Hey, look at this, it's a video of someone trying to do that scene from the Aristocats on the piano? But they failed horribly, it's literally (A/N: Li-tral-ly) the weirdest cat ever!" I peered over his shoulder, yep. That was definitely a cat on a piano, except the piano ended up on the cat somehow? I laughed. "Oh my god, the poor cat!" "Hmmm" Dan was distracted now, he wasn't paying attention to me anymore, so I leaned on his shoulder and pulled out my phone for a game of Crossy Road. We sat like that for a while, if you could call the browsing position sitting.

"We should get a cat." Dan shrugged, "Sure, whatever, but you're allergic."

"I'm not allergic to babies."

"What the fuck has that got to do with it?"

I took a breath. "Dan, I want a baby." He turned toward me, "You are aware neither of us have uteruses?"

"You know what I mean!"

"Phil, I get it, I really do. But... erm... Look, I know you're excited about us being public after after these few years, but it took me a while to feel comfortable about it, you know that.

"And then spontaneously you were all, 'Hey Dan, let's adopt a kid!' and I thought, why not, I guess? But now we've got this teenage girl to be responsible for, and honestly, this is hard enough for me. And now you're saying, 'Hey Dan, let's adopt another kid, this time the baby we were after when we found a 14 year old' that neither of us are really capable of taking care of.

"Alana honestly knows more about parenting than us! Since she was like ten she's raised herself as far as emotional support and cooking and shit, mostly. Not to mention all those little girls who she helped and took care of at the orphanage, you saw how they looked up to her! And now, sure, we're here for her, but she's still kind of dealing with everything herself, she figured out all her school stuff, she had to talk to the phone provider people when we switched her over to our plan, because she knows things about her phone we don't. And I don't fucking know anything about girl stuff, much less being a parent to an adolescent one! So maybe, we're not even able to have her!

"We're fucking horrible at being parents and you know it. I honestly wasn't ready Phil, okay? I'm still not ready! But I wanted to make you happy, because that's how I love you best. But, Lion, not right now, okay? Please?"

I nodded, surprised at his outburst. A small cough and a shuffle came from the hallway, and I stood up. "Lana?" But she hadn't just come in, she was leaving, towards her room. She turned to me, "I'll just be, uh, in my room." I nodded, then walked back into the lounge.

"Dan, I'm pretty sure she heard you..."

He put his laptop down and stood up. "Oh god. Oh my fucking god, fuck!" He turned and ran up the stairs to her room. And, if you know Dan, you know he never runs.

~Dan's pov~

Fuck. Fuck. Why did I say that? Did Alana think we were sending her back? What if she only heard the last part? That would be worse. Fuck.

I knocked on her door. "It's open." Alana was lying on her bed, listening to music and staring at the ceiling.

"Something interesting up there?" I sat down on the foot of the bed.

"Not particularly"

"How much did you hear?"

"Most, I think."

"So Phil wants a baby"

"Didn't hear that part."

"That's what it was about."

"You can't- you said you don't know anything about being a parent...?"

"That's because I don't."

"So am I- are you- will you not be a parent... anymore?"

"Erm, well, I-I- you're staying here, with us, if that's what you're wondering. I'm going to try, at least. It was sort of Phil's idea."

"I sort of thought so."

"Yeah that's about it. Okay, I'll leave now, but what do you want for dinner?"

She shrugged, "I don't really care." The tension was still strong, but I was pretty sure she'd get over it. I knew I would. So I left, shutting the door behind me.

Phil was in the kitchen, glaring at the innards of the fridge. I crept behind him and wrapped my arms around his torso. He jumped, turning around, "What the?! Oh, it's you. Phew." I laughed, "Who did you think it was?" He shrugged, "I don't know, some sort of masked intruder?"  I rolled my eyes. I had the strangest and most amazing boyfriend ever.

~Alana's pov~

When I opened the door, I could hear Dan's voice from the lounge, so I started towards it.  But then;

"...Alana honestly knows more about parenting than us! Since she was like ten she's raised herself as far as emotional support and cooking and shit, mostly. Not to mention all those little girls who she helped and took care of at the orphanage, you saw how they looked up to her! And now, sure, we're here for her, but she's still kind of dealing with everything herself, she figured out all her school stuff, she had to talk to the phone provider people when we switched her over to our plan, because she knows things about her phone we don't. And I don't fucking know anything about girl stuff, much less being a parent to an adolescent one! So maybe, we're not even able to have her!

"We're fucking horrible at being parents and you know it. I honestly wasn't ready Phil, okay? I'm still not ready! But I wanted to make you happy, because that's how I love you best. But, Lion, not right now, okay? Please?"

I wasn't exactly sure what I had heard. Dan wasn't ready for what? So when Phil came out to the hallway, I just said I would be in my room. And when Dan came to talk to me I asked about it. He seemed to answer honestly, and I just accepted the answers for what they were. But I was still a little uneasy. I couldn't go back. Not after this.

A/N: What the actual fuck you guys 500 reads?!!1! We're halfway to 1k! Not that it matters or anything, Pffft. Btw, I wrote most of this chapter on real paper with an actual pencil. Or it might've been a pen. Either way, it was surprisingly harder than typing. Oh, the chapter title? I don't know why I called it that. I just couldn't think of a title I guess. Okay, baiiii!

*Doucheboard exit*
(If you got that that means you watch Smosh and if you watch Smosh we are friends. Unless you don't want to, that's cool... *cries in the corner*)

~ Skye xx