To Keep From Getting Burned

Heartache Every Moment

Lilith's POV :

As when trying to block everything out I don't even notice Kuza trying to talk to me until he's shaking me "What" "I said Lu you've got to do this you need to" I just shook my head and looked down. But that didn't stop Kuza he tilted my head up to meet his gaze and caressed my cheek knowing that that's another thing that keeps me from having panic attacks.

He gives me a reassuring look and I then come to a conclusion that this needs to happen one way or another and I should've know that this was possible in the first place. God I'm so stupid.

I get up off the floor with Kuza's help I keep close to him wrapping my arm around his waist and him rubbing his finger tips on my arm to keep me calm I look at him one last time before looking at the guys but before I do Kuza gives me one last look before giving a kiss on my head.

I then look at them one at a time they all look the same but different at the same time before speaking to them. My nerves just keep going through me causing me to pull down my Killstarco bat dress.

"Now boys what are you doing in my shop" I hear Kuza huff behind me causing me to grin and repeat my self "I mean Kuza and I's shop"

I can tell they're just as nervous as I but Chris steps up to the plate to talk "Umm we were hoping to get a tattoo based off our band" I nod "Ryan-Ashley I need your help over here" I see her coming up to me and stand beside me "Ok what do ya need" "Ok they all want tattoos so I need your help tattooing them but before you go and set up your station can you get Night so he can help to" she nods and goes to him talking quietly.

I turn towards the boys again "Ricky and Ghost your going with Kuza I suppose Balz and TJ your going with Ryan-Ashley, Vinny and Ryan you can go with Night and Chris and Angelo your with me" they all nod and go with they're artists while Angelo and Chris follow me.

"Now what would you like" "Umm we got designs Angelo drew them up" I nod and take the sketches.

"Ok just let me I'll go sketch this up" it only took me 10 minutes to do it so I then called them back and told Angelo to take a seat I go to my phone real quick and turn up the speakers that's connected to my phone by an aux cord that's connected to my phone to the speakers I go to my Marilyn Manson Playlist and click I Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me and head back to my station and get started on the tattoo I sit quietly not talking until Chris starts a conversation that I don't want to began with.

"Why did you leave" he says I stay quiet for a couple seconds trying to open my mind before I speak and then I do "Chris there are certain things that needed to be done and that was one of them I needed for you and the guys to live a life without my bullshit I had already done so much to you and the guys you didn't need anymore"

"I... I felt that it was necessary because I knew you guys would be ok you didn't need me none of you did all I did was cause destruction to you and the guys and I couldn't bare but think that I was a certain burden that you guys were having a difficult time trying to stop"

He tried to stop me from speaking but by the look on my face he knew I wasn't done and he shut up and let me finish.

"I knew that when I ran into Angelo that you would figure out that I was alive that I ran away with you in the dust but please understand all that I've done was for you guys not me"

Ok how was this chapter hopefully it was good I might be updating again tomorrow if not then the next day because in the next two weeks are gonna be havoc and chaos because finals are coming up and I'm going to be very busy for me so please hang tight for the time being until next update
--Creepy_fallen_Creature