When You Left Me

Im Not Crazy

I looked at Laurent and Jessica talking , I wondered why I couldn't hear them. Or anything for that matter. It was silence. Deadly, why? " poor little Jasmine..." I froze as the voice spoke and then I screamed.

( Laurents POV )

I stood there trying to explain to Jessica what happened. It was difficult because to be honest, I don't know how it happened myself. It was like I saw Jasmine and everything I had felt for her in high school returned. I yearned to touch her and when she surrendered and allowed me to, it was like I couldn't stop. She looked so different. Of course, Jasmine hadn't been gorgeous in high school but back then it wasn't her physical appearance I had fell for.

It was her true personality, the one she hid from the world that I had fell in love with. I never been so emotionally attached to someone other than my twin. So when me and jasmine had bonded over music, it was something new and fresh. I did love her and I was pretty sure I never stopped loving her. It's just certain things happened and I was forced to let her go. I want to tell her why I left two years ago but my guilt over what it would do to Jessica stopped me. I heard Jessica ask who was she.

"She was the girl I was dating in high school before I met you. The one I broke up with on graduation night." Jessica seemed to have a hard time remembering, and just as I was about to tell her to let me talk to Jasmine alone for a few minutes, I heard this scream. It wasn't a scream of pain but more of fear and dread. My heart stopped and I felt my body react to the scream. I moved so quick, I couldn't remember when I made it to Jasmines side.

Her face looked terrified and she had her hands over her ears. I could hear her muttering over and over no no no no. I remembered this. It happened a few times but Jasmine never explained to me why, she would just say she got really bad migraines and that it would feel like her head was on fire. I always felt there was more to it because I could always hear her talk to herself. Who spoke to themselves with a migraine? Wouldn't that make it worse? I told Jessica to go get the nurse and when she wouldn't move , I snapped.

"Jessica, go get the fucking nurse RIGHT NOW!", Jessica looked at me, a little frightened and ran out the door. I put my hands on Jasmines and softly spoke to her.

"Jazz, listen to me I need you to calm down. Your going to hurt yourself if you don't relax , petit ."
But she couldn't seem to hear me. Jasmine started to dig her nails into the sides of her ears, crying.

"Make it stop Lau , please please please make them stop!" She was thrashing her head and I was starting to panic. I had to stop her before she really hurt herself. So before I knew it , I climbed on top of Jasmine and grabbed her hands and held them from her. She lost it. Her eyes opened wide and the tears falling from them seemed never ending. Her body shook and she cried out. She kicked and tried to get her arms out of my grip. Larry burst in the door and I looked in his direction, the fear in my face evident. Larry went to her legs and held them in place. The nurse came in behind Larry and I could see a syringe in her hand. Before she could get to Jasmine , I asked. "What the fuck is that? She doesn't like needles and I'll be damned if your sticking something I don't know in her.", the nurse looked at me and said that it was a sedative. It would make her calm down and sleep. I looked at Larry and when he nodded his head, I allowed the nurse to give Jasmine the shot.

Jasmines body went slack and her eyes started to close. I waited until I heard her soft snores before I got off of her. My body felt drained from everything but my mind was racing. What was wrong with Jasmine? Larry sighed and sat down at the chair near the bed. The nurse said she would be back in a little later and left. I sat on the opposite chair of Larry and rested my head in my hands.

"I guess she stopped taking her medicine again. Dammit I told her mom to make sure she takes it."
I raised my head and looked at Larry. What? Medicine? Jasmine never took medicine with me, hell she hated taking Advil for cramps. So I asked.

"what you talking about bro? Jasmine doesn't take medication. She hates anything like that because her mom used to be addicted to pills and now they scare Jasmine. So what you mean?" Larry face went blank for a second. I knew my twin.
He was going to lie. He always got this look on his face when he was telling a lie. Others would never know but me, I was his twin. I understood him like no one else. He should know better.

"Larry, don't you lie to me. I see it. Tell me what the fuck is wrong with Jasmine. " Larry eyes went back to Jasmine and he sighed again. He grabbed her hand and softly rubbed his thumb across it.

"Laurent.... Jasmine suffers from anxiety and depression. But you know this. What you don't know is the true extent of it. She hears a voice in her head. It's just her really, but that version of Jasmine says out loud all the bad and ugly things Jasmine feels about herself. When you guys were together, it wasn't so bad. Jasmine was able to keep everything at bay. I only saw her truly lose it the day of graduation after you broke up with her. I was walking by the gazebo with Waydi and Roy. I heard a whimper and Jasmine was just lying there. Her eyes were so empty and I could her muttering over and over I'm not crazy. I picked her up and me and Waydi took her home. I stayed until the paramedics came and said she was suffering a mental breakdown. Her mom knew this and said that she couldn't afford the medication for Jasmine. I offered to pay for it and I still do to this day. I guess she hasn't taken it lately." Larry gazed down at Jasmine. I felt a cold sweat all over my body. I did this to Jasmine.

I broke her and when she was getting it together again, I reappeared and broke her again. The guilt that rose up in my body left me breathless. I looked at Jasmine and vowed to make it better again.

( End Chapter )

I don't like this chapter much. Tell me what you guys think .