When You Left Me

Giving Up?

( Laurent )

After my fifth round of destroying people online in Naruto, I decided I should try to eat something. It was already 4 pm and I've yet to move from this spot on the floor. The game had done a good job at distracting me from my loneliness until I had won a round and turned to celebrate with Larry, only to remember he was gone too. The empty crater I called my heart widened further. I unsteadily stood up, I needed to get a grip. I couldn't believe how weak I've become. I picked up the phone to order room service and told them to send up a platter of fresh fruits, the steak tips with creamy potatoes, and some water. I walked over to the glass sliding doors that led out to the balcony of the hotel. I opened them and stepped out into the cool air of San Fran. I leaned on the railing and just stared out at the city. Everyone looked to be having a good time and enjoying their lives. I watched as a local band played their music and couples and friends alike begin to dance. The soft melody and the lead singers sweet tone wafted up towards me. I couldn't help but think of Jasmine. I wondered if she still sings. I rested my chin in the palm of my hand and let my mind be overtaken by the world. I could hear and see kids playing basketball, some of them whining about cheating. I heard an argument that included the words bitch and fuck you. Guess I wasn't the only one having problems. I kept going back to thinking about Jasmine and that was starting to irk me. She sounded like she was fine when I heard her speaking and laughing on the phone call with Larry. I wonder if I was even crossing her mind as she did mine. Maybe I'm a fool in thinking she'll come back to me. Maybe Jasmine decided I wasn't what she wanted and moved on. The thought depressed me and caused my heart to seize up. God, why was I so weak over her?! I exhaled a harsh breath, pissed off with my defeatist and masochistic attitude. If she found somewhere to be happy, maybe I should too. After all, I've gotten nothing from her since she left. No letters and no phone calls! Larry thought I didn't know that she sent him a letter but I found it along time ago. He keeps it in his personal bag and I found it one day when I was looking for my beaded necklace. So she deemed him worthy of a letter but not me?! A knock at the door interrupted my angry musings and I went to answer it. A pretty woman wearing the hotel staff uniform stood at the door with the cart containing what I requested. "Here you are Mr.Bourgeois. I hope everything will be to your liking." Her lips perked up into a pretty little smile on her caramel face. Her thick Spanish accent was very attractive to me  and I found myself smiling back at her. "Thank you belle, I'm sure it will be. Here's a little tip for you." I handed her a 50 dollar bill and her cheeks brightened a pretty pink. I read her name tag and it read Bella. Oh, what a coincidence. I took the platters and water off the cart and decided on something. "Are you busy Bella?" She shook her head no and I just went with it. "Would you like to join me? I'm all by myself and it's a sad thing to eat dinner alone." Her blush darkened and she bit her lip. "s'il vous plaît joindre à moi, I really prefer not being alone right now." That did the trick and she quickly said okay and entered the room. I closed the door, my face for a split second displaying all my sadness then was replaced with uncaring nonchalance.

( Jasmine )

I walked down the stairs and made my way towards the ramp that entered the building. My mind was all over the place and I was struggling with my inner turmoil. I couldn't be sure if I was making the right decision. Something deep in me screamed that I was to late and that I should just go home, back to the center. But I fought it. I had to stop relying on everything and everybody else. I had to stand on my own, that was the only way I could ever be the woman I wanted to be for Laurent and the woman that Larry believed me to be. People were chatting away everywhere and I could hear happy rejoicing laughs and sad heart wrenching sobs. I hated this place. I made my way through the crowns to the front desk. The lady worker smiled and asked "May I help you?" And I almost ran away. My feet quivered and begged to leave but I stayed still. "Yes, I'm looking for a Miss Eleni. I was told she would be here for a Miss Jasmine." The lady checked the books for waiting parties. "Ah yes, she is the fifth wing to the right. She will be in the VIP section ma'am. It also says that your ride will be there as well." I thanked her and went in search of Eleni. I found her only because I knew that damn shape anywhere. "Eleni!" She whirled around at her name being called and I threw my arms around her, knocking the breath straight from her. "Oh my gosh Jasmine. You're here! You look amazing and healthy. I was worried about you." I hugged her again, my heart so happy to see her face. "Yes I an, despite my want to run away. I am healthy. Do not worry, I have been okay." She took my hand and walked off with me in tow. "I'm glad. It's so good to see you Jasmine. Come on, we have a ride to catch." I laughed at her giddiness and just followed as she pulled me along with her. We stepped out into the cool air of San Fran and I inhaled the scent. It's been a long time.

End chapter