Darcy's diary [ h.s. updating ]

5.

harry

numbness // partial or total lack of sensation in a part of the body; a symptom of nerve damage or dysfunction.

I didn't know that this sort of feeling was ever possible. The feeling that eats the life out of you and leaves you choking and barely alive. The feeling where a fist is clamped around your heart. And the worst part? you can't feel anything at all.

Try seeing your seven year old daughter realize her Mom's never waking up from that damn coffin. Your already shattered heart, broken into a million more pieces. forever.

"But daddy, mommy's just sleeping" she smiled proudly.

"No, she's not..." I explained.

"I'll show you daddy!" she raised her voice; attempting to prove that she was right.

"Mommy, wake up. Let's go home. You can sleep in my bed" she called out through the glass totally breaking my heart.

A tear falls from Zayn's right eye. Louis just pats my back, trying to give me comfort. Niall keeps his head down the entire time.

"She's not coming back! Damn it Soph!" as soon as I uttered those words everything went into a blur. I'm thankful Louis' caught me while Soph cried, thrashed, and tried to break the glass on the coffin. Of course she was stopped by Zayn.

"I'm so sorry..." I sob loudly as Zayn and Eleanor take her outside.

♡

darcy

I know Mom's alive and just sleeping. How come daddy said she wouldn't wake up? I want to prove that I'm right and that I'm a grown up. I know Mommy is just sleeping.

"She's not coming back! Damn it Soph!" Daddy screamed at me. Why was he yelling?

Uncle Zayn and Aunt El decide to take me outside.

The sun is shining brightly and the grass is super green. Flowers are everywhere and there is a pretty fountain with a pretty girl in the middle of it. There's a swing that could fit two people in the corner of the garden. 

Auntie Eleanor takes a seat next to me and Uncle Zayn kneels in front of me. I sob onto Auntie Eleanor's lap while Uncle Zayn rubs my back.

"Why is Daddy mad at me?" I sniff.

"He isn't mad, love" Auntie El soothes. "He's just going through a difficult time" she explains.

"But why can't Mommy just wake up?" I ask, sitting up and swinging my legs.

"Because, love. Mommy got hit by a truck when she was driving. When they brought her to the hospital, she died" Zayn explains.

"What does died mean?" I'm just confused.

"When you die, you don't wake up anymore. Your spirit that keeps you alive, leaves your body and you go somewhere else" Auntie El tries to explain.

"Oh. so Mommy's not waking up anymore? Because she died?"

"Yes, Soph..."