Tomorrow Never Dies

Chapter 29 - "I love you."

When I woke up, my phone was buzzing with texts from Toby, Matty and Mum as well as Grace. I scrolled through them, squinting as the brightness stung my eyes.
Toby: come home flo, something's happened. can't tell you over text, but you need to be here
Matty: flower you ought to come home. keep your head up x
Mumma: Hi baby. Your brothers have probably already told you but I'd really like you home asap xx
W4L: i miss u
I texted only Toby, telling him I was on my way, and Grace, telling her I missed her too. Then I shook Michael softly, waking him up.

"I know you're still in your pyjamas, but my family want me at home and I can't drive myself," I began. "So please can you give me a lift?"

"Of course," he smiled, nuzzling my neck.

"We don't have time, Michael," I said, trying not to sound too horrible. I could tell something was wrong at home but I wasn't sure what. "I'm sorry, I just need to be at home." He nodded, and we ran out to his car without being seen in our pyjamas (his consisted of his boxers, mine a short sleeved top and booty shorts). We drove in silence, slightly more awkwardly than usual, but I was stressing about what could have happened, and Michael was chewing on his lip, clearly worried about me. He pulled up outside my house, stalling the car for a moment.

"Let me know what happened," he said, kissing me softly before letting me get out and go into my house. As soon as I was through the door, Matty's strong arms were around me. He guided me into the living room, and I sat down next to my mum, who looked kind of rough.

"Flora," she began softly, and I could tell from her voice that she'd been crying. My big strong Mum, who had been there for me through thick and thin, had been broken by something. "You know your Auntie Carole hasn't been very well?" I nodded mutely, realising where the conversation was going. "She passed away last night in her sleep." I nodded again, hugged Mum, then went up to my bedroom.

Then the tears came.

I think the first emotion I felt was guilt. Guilt that I had decided to go out with Grace instead of take the last opportunity I'd had to see her. Guilt that I'd said that I preferred to remember happy memories with her, rather than just admit I didn't like hospitals. Guilt that I'd hoped - assumed - that she'd get better.

Then came the realisation that I was never going to see her again. The last time I'd seen her, we'd been talking about how little time we spent together and how after my showcase I had to go to stay with her. But then she'd got ill, and we never got the chance. She was gone. The tears were streaming down my face, and when I caught sight of myself in the mirror I noticed my eyes were bloodshot. I shook my head, looking away, and grabbed a tissue. I climbed into bed, curled into a ball, and let myself cry properly. The door opened quietly and Toby walked in.

"Hey, Flo," he said softly, sitting on my bed.

"She's gone," I sniffled, and he nodded, rubbing my back.

"I know, but she's not in pain anymore. Just remember that." He got into bed next to me and held me, letting me cry into his shoulder, and it was at that moment that I realised how much I'd missed him. He wasn't as big as Matty, but he was still taller and stronger than me. I grabbed my phone as he hugged me and texted Michael and Flora. The message to both of them was the same.
my auntie has died, i'm staying at home for a while
They both responded within a minute.
Michael❤️: I'm so sorry baby, I'm here for you if you need. I love you xx
W4L: love you flozza. stay strong x
Toby and I were cuddling for a while, and then the doorbell rang. I let Mum or Matty get it, not wanting to move from the comfort of my big brother's arms, but moments later there was a knock at my bedroom door and Michael stuck his head on. I got up and walked slowly into his open arms.

"Oh, baby," he whispered. "I'm so sorry." I shook my head as he kissed my hair.

"Why do people say that? You couldn't have done anything?"

"It's an... expression of sympathy."

"Flo, I'm going down to Mum," Toby patted me on the shoulder, and I nodded. He left my bedroom, allowing Michael and I to be alone.

"Were you expecting it?" Michael asked softly, still cradling me gently as if I were a child. I shrugged.

"She was ill, she had been for a long time," I began. "But I'd kind of hoped she was going to get better."

"She's in a better place now," he said, his voice soothing and calm. I nodded into his chest and he guided me over to my bed, lying down next to me. "It's okay to cry if you need baby."

"I did, I looked so ugly and disgusting."

"I don't care, you're allowed to grieve." He kissed my forehead softly, then reached for the TV remote. He flicked on Netflix and put on an episode of House, knowing it would take my mind off things. The episode played, but I ignored it largely, instead focussing on Michael. He'd driven back to see me because I'd told him what had happened. He didn't care how I looked when I cried. He was trying his hardest to be there for me when I struggled, and I loved him for it.

"I love you," I told him, really meaning it. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, baby," he whispered. "I really do."

*****
Hello so sorry i havent been updating bc my auntie did die last week & i found out i cant go to the funeral bc i have an english exam on the same day so im beyond pissed off
In other news it was graces birthday yesterday and she's the best i love her to bits

Song of the chapter: girls by the 1975