Engaged [z.m.]

Chapter 48: Why

C H A P T E R  F O R T Y - E I G H T

Zayn

Listen to Gabrielle Aplins's-Power of Love

Thus began a month of endless hours rehearsing for a tour that seemed like my only source of potential happiness anytime soon. A month of endless hours spent at parties. A month of endless hours that I spent conjuring up excuses to leave my house and the way it haunted me.

The call came one week prior to the beginning of our US tour. It was early morning, I had opened up most of the windows in the house; letting the sun peek in and to finally allow this enclosed house to enjoy some sun. The windows allowed in a slightly cold breeze that wound its way throughout my flat. It felt fresh and gave life to my dying house.

I stepped out into the balcony connected to my bedroom. The mid March weather was fantastic. Although the weather was quite unpredictable yet it was not nearly as cold as I had expected it to be. London had also been particularly welcoming towards the sun this month which was a blessing to almost everyone residing within this rainy city.

The sound of my phone echoed through the entire flat due to the lack of other noises that would potentially dissolve it. I jolted upwards as the sudden commotion made it's way into the balcony, bursting my bubble. I internally groaned, debating on whether to go inside and receive it considering it was probably Lily calling to insure that I had woken up. Her lack of confidence in my devotion towards my responsibilities alarmed me considering I had not missed or been late to any of my rehearsals since the day they began.

It occured to me that it was probable she would devise a lecture and convey it to me when I arrived for rehearsals on how I needed to establish a habit of picking up my cell phone. So it was in my best interests that I pick up the call.

I made my way to my bedside table, grabbing a hold of my phone. I looked down at the caller ID.

I was surprised to find that it was Lily, neither was it any of our tour managers who occasionally called me as well. Instead, it was my mum.

I slid my thumb across the screen, bringing my hand up to my ear as I made my way back to the balcony.

"Mum, hello" I smiled as I awaited her response which came after a few seconds of silence just as I was about to open my mouth to question whether she could even hear me or not.

"Zayn"

I frowned. Something was wrong. I could sense it. "Mum, is everything alright?"

Another silence. "Ye-yeah. How are you?"

Her voice sounded tired and hollow. She had complained in our last phone call that she was having trouble sleeping yet it seemed as if that problem hadn't resolved despite the fact that I pestered her to take a sleeping pill and immediately go to a doctor the next morning.

"I'm fine. How are you? Sleeping any better?"

"A little better I suppose"

"Did you visit the doctor?"

The longest silence yet followed this question of mine. My stomach churned, I knew something was wrong. I was certain and my heart thudded as I waited for her to reveal it to me.

"Yes"

"And?" It was becoming enraged at how she was toying around the subject.

"Zayn, you shouldn't worry so much about me. I-"