The heart of a poet

Almost lover

Can't look in the mirror anymore, I'm such an eye sore. You didn't want me to have to struggle, but ___ I don't care I just wish we could cuddle. I love you so much words can't explain, and I miss you so much I feel deranged. I feel like I'm walking in the world as a lost soul, I feel like in my heart there's a hole. You're my sunshine on a rainy day the one who puts a smile on my face, forever I'll hold these memories I can't erase. I won't move on, without you something just feels wrong. You told me I'd find someone else, that won't work because darling I want no one but you. I've had awhile to think all these sleepless nights crying to myself, and I don't care about anything but you. Get up and leave my life behind just to hug you one time, I just wanna be in your embrace. But if my one wish came true, oh darling I don't think I could ever let go of you. I know you're going through pain too, but babe please don't feel blue. All I care about is you being happy, I don't need anything snazzy. A smile on your face would hold me up for days, you being euphoric really pays. Everyday not being able to tell you I love you kills me, I feel no glee. Lost my appetite but still forced to ingest, doesn't really matter I guess.  I just need to get strong for the day that you move on, because I know I'll feel even more pain. Being strong won't be enough but it'll get me by for awhile. But I just want to know what happened to forever, because honey I'd find my way to you whatsoever. I told you I don't care what my parents think of you, because I don't want anyone new. You'll never get to read this but that's okay, because it doesn't matter what I say. Why don't our conversations feel the same, like there's some sort of space? Even before we were forever it didn't feel like this, what is this abyss? I just want you to know I'll always love you and you'll always be my one and only, and even when you move on I won't be lonely. Talking to you is enough for me, but I'll never let my feelings go free.