Aftermath (Bucky Barnes)

Chapter Twenty Four

Natasha helped clean up the cuts across my face and arms while inside Bucky's room. I just wanted to make sure he was okay.

Victoria had left hours ago because she needed to go to work, Bucky should wake up any hour now.

Natasha left me and I was sitting in the chair next to Bucky's bed admiring him. I grabbed his real hand,

"I hope you can't hear me, I mean I want to say this to you directly but it's too hard... Everyday I was gone I thought about you, I'm sorry. I was so scared of losing you because I was brainwashed that I tried to act like I didn't know you. I never meant to hurt you. I think I still love you, I definitely do actually. But I've talked with Victoria and she's a better match for you. I'm not offended, plus I'm better off alone.

I have the same nightmares you have, about killing. I barely sleep now. I think I'm retiring as an Avenger, I found a new recruit, he will replace me. Plus it would be to hard working with you. But I'm always going to be your friend." I whispered and he didn't move.

"And you didn't hurt me today, you only hurt Hydra, and we captured them. Steve is interrogating them, I rather stay with you." I smiled and kissed his cheek.

I leaned back in my seat and closed my eyes.
Maybe I could get a few minutes of sleep, just until he gets up.

Bucky Barnes Point of View: I heard everything she said. Everything.

But I couldn't move, I stayed quiet, I wanted to apologize and win her back, but I said so many bad things to her.

I also missed her everyday she was gone, every single damn day.

Once I finally opened my eyes, I watched her, she was asleep in a chair beside me.

I studied her, she has a lot of cuts and bruises forming, her hair was up in a pony tail, she was still in her suit.

For a second, it felt like nothing had changed between us. I liked when we were both superheroes who saved the world as partners.

It was fun. "I'm up." I whispered and surprisingly she opened her eyes. I smiled at her and she smiled, that's what I missed the most, seeing her happy.

"How are you feeling?" She asked and I felt sore but that's it. "I'm doing okay, did I hurt you? I haven't talked to you in a long time..."

"You didn't hurt me, and I'm so sorry Bucky, I was too emotional and it's all my fault, I shouldn't have lied to you, I thought it would be easier."

"I regret what I said, I'm sorry, how about we forget it happened. I don't like thinking about it."

"Sounds like a plan." She smiled, her dimples showing. I felt all tingly and I couldn't tell if it was the drugs or how she made me feel.

"I should call Victoria, she wanted an update." She said and I frowned. "Daniella, please she was just a rebound I don't actually like her." I pleased and she put her hand to her mouth.

"You can't say that, you are in a relationship with her, you chose to be in it. You've changed in a year, and not for the better." She snapped. I realize how I moved on, or at least tried while she was living in back alleys all alone.

So I didn't yell back at her. "I'll call her myself." I said and she sighed. "Maybe I should go," she said and my heart dropped, "Please Dani, I- I just, never mind, just go." I said and laid back into the bed.

I'm such a moron. She left quietly and Sam walked in with two muffins. "Dani left? She's been waiting here for hours for you to wake up." He frowned.

"Can I have that muffin." I asked and he licked it before handing it to me, you realize I've eaten worse." I smiled and he took the remote to my bed and started crushing me in between the mattresses.

"I hate you." I said after my knees were touching my shoulders.

"So let's cut or the chase, what's up with you and Dani, she left your room crying? Break up with Victoria already, she still loves you and you love her."

"Sam, can you just shoot me?"

"Yeah, no." He said and I laughed with him. "I don't know what I feel anymore, nothing really."

"Man, you are depressing as hell." He said and I nodded. "When can I leave this place?" I asked and he shrugged.

"Do you want to kill me?" He asked and I smirked. "You know what, don't answer that, as long as you're you again, we can go." He said and threw me some pants

---

I walked by Dani's room and heard her talking. Naturally I listened. "For real? You want me to come to your school?"

"Yes, I bragged about knowing you guys because of the September Foundation, so I promised I'd bring you in." Peter said.

"I'm honored." He said and I knew she was happy. I smiled, I was the one who told Peter to ask her. He asked me last night and I told him to ask Dani.

I walked back into my room and Natasha was sitting on my bed. "What?" I asked and she smirked.

"Dani's birthday is in a week, you usually help me plan it."

I inhaled, "yeah not this time." I sighed.

"Bucky,"

"Just get out, she's your friend, plan it yourself." I snapped and she walked out.

She looked like she was going to say something but snapped out of it and left. She slammed the door on the way out and walked to Daniella's room.

I picked up a glass cup and threw it at the wall. I was so angry at myself I would rather take it out on others? What's gotten into me?