NCIS High School Teenage Years

Chapter 24: Glimpses Into the Past

It was midnight. Tony lay in his bed, awake and unable to fall asleep. He was processing what Ziva had told him.

"Maybe that's why she's so emotionless and guarded". Tony thought. "She loved her Aunt Nettie, and she was taken away from her because she showed emotion. If Ziva hadn't cried, Aunt Nettie would still be allowed to see her niece".

Tony was proud of himself. He finally figured out why she was emotionless and guarded all the time. Now, it was time to break down all her walls. He hated the fact that Ziva thought she was unloved and unwanted. Tony wanted to show her how very wrong she was.

His bed creaked a little when he slowly got up. He tiptoed out or his room, and walked soundlessly to Ziva's door. He pressed his ear to her door and checked if she was asleep.

Ziva appeared to have a nightmare. Tony heard her toss and turn in her bed, and mutter the words "Lo. Lo. Lo". In Hebrew.

Tony quickly opened the door, and was quickly at her side. He shook her to try to wake her up from her nightmare.

"Ziva, Zeevah". He whispered to her. "Wake up. It's just a dream".

Ziva muttered "Lo" one last time before lashing out; almost hitting Tony with her fist.

Tony grabbed her arm tightly, and shook her gently again. Ziva's eyes snapped open, and she abruptly sat up in her bed. She was sweating and panting.

"Relax, Ziva. It was just a dream". Tony tried to soothe her.

"No it's not". Ziva responded, still breathing hard. She laid back down on her bed, and patted Tony's upper arm. "Leave me alone, Tony. I'm fine. Really". She said, as she turned on her side; facing away from him.

Tony decided not to say anything. He gave one last look at Ziva, before walking out of the room.

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Ziva opened her eyes again as soon as she heard Tony leave. Guilt washed over her, and she felt terrible. All he wanted to do was help her, but she pushed him away. But it was the only way to ensure that she didn't get too close to him, and become emotionally attached.

She wanted nothing but to fall asleep in Tony's arms. But she knew it was impossible. Ziva rolled her eyes about how silly she was being. Tony was a skirt-chaser. A player. A womanizer. If Ziva let him into her heart, he would only hurt her. Besides, all the people she let into her heart were taken away from her. She didn't want to risk that with Tony.

"Keep your distance, Tony. The ones who get to close, always end up dead". She thought to herself before slipping into an uneasy sleep.

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A few hours later, Ziva awoke with a jump. She had another nightmare. Tears sprung in her eyes as she remembered the dream.

"Bevakasha, Abba. Bevakasha!"

"Lo, Ziva. My decision is final. Aunt Nettie will be leaving tonight, and she will never come back".

"Abba!"

"Stop crying. STOP!!"

"Abba, bevakasha!"

"Go! Get out of my sight you pathetic child. Go!"

"Abba, why are you doing this to me?!"

"DID I NOT MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?! Stop crying!!"

"Abba..."

"Why are you still crying?" You are WEAK!! Do you hear me? WEAK!"

"I don't want her to leave!"

"I don't care what you want! I couldn't care less! Honestly, I would break your skull, and you would deserve it!"

Ziva whipped away a tear that was rolling down her cheek. "I would break your skull, and you would deserve it". Her father's voice echoed in her head. "I would break your skull, and you would deserve it".

Ziva curled up into a ball, and brought her hands to her ears. "Stop it!" She commanded her father's voice in her head. "I would break your skull, and you would deserve it".

Ziva gritted her teeth. "Please stop. Go away!" She commanded again. This time, she could hear her father's voice calling her all the names he had ever called her .

"Worthless".
"Pathetic".
"Disobedient bitch".
"Disrespectful brat".
"Useless".
"A mistake".
"Constant source of irritation".
"Life ruiner".

Ziva pulled at her hair, and squeezed her eyes shut. "Stop! Please stop!" She pleaded with herself .

"Life ruiner. Life ruiner. Life ruiner".

"I am not!" Ziva sobbed, and covered her ears again. "Life ruiner. Life ruiner. Life ruiner".

"ENOUGH!" Ziva screamed. Her scream was muffled by her pillow, as she screamed into it.

Ziva had enough. Enough of all the verbal and emotional abuse she had to endure. She wanted something permanent. Something that couldn't be taken away from her. She wanted to be loved, to be cared about. To be happy.

With tears still in her eyes, Ziva got out of bed, and walked out of her room.

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"Tony?" Ziva whispered to a sleeping Tony. "Tony". She shook him, but he just moaned and rolled over.

"Toonyyy". Ziva stretched out his name.

This time, Tony stirred and opened his eyes. Once he saw Ziva, he broke into a huge grin, and sprung up in bed.

"Ziva!" He whispered. "What are you doing here?"

"Can I sleep here tonight?" She asked cautiously.

Tony grinned even wider. "Of course you can! You don't even have to ask". He scooted over, and left enough room for Ziva to climb in.

Ziva snuggled close to Tony, as they lay facing each other; holding each other tight.

Tony ran his fingers through her hair as Ziva nestled her nose in the crook of his neck.

"Thank you, Tony". Ziva mumbled sleepily .

Tony yawned. "Don't even mention it".

A few minutes later, both Ziva and Tony fell into a deep sleep.