Sanity (Peterick)

24

Patrick's POV

I woke up and I already knew he was gone. I could feel it in the air. Pete always brings a certain kind of energy to the room, not a sad one but not necessarily a happy one either, I don't know it's hard to explain.

I sat up, but then noticed writing on my hand. Pete's handwriting obviously. It's in all lowercase, Pete does that.

Hey Patrick. First off, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I had to leave, I really mean it. Trust me it wasn't easy. Gimme a call when you have the chance. Love you.

I plop back down on my bed. I won't dare look at the message again, it makes me feel too sad.

Pete's in my mind again, just him in general. I'm almost a billion percent sure Pete would be okay without be, but, God, I'm so desperate that I feel like I can't last till the afternoon.

I think about how he thinks of me. He says I'm his everything, and I really love him for that. Makes me happy just thinking about it. But, at the same time I can't help wonder why he thinks that. What really goes on in his head when he looks at me.

I know what goes on in my head when I look at him, that's for sure. If you've ever looked at someone and thought; wow, I wonder what it's like to be that beautiful, then that's it.

I don't know, I'm getting too cheesy. I think right now would be a good time to think about how the hell in gonna get out of this place. You know, I would just pretend I was better to get out, the old "fake it to make it" type thing. Problem is, you can't really "fake away" something like what I've got.

All of a sudden, I hear Brendon come in my room. By now, I know it's Brendon because of the way he opens the door. He cracks it open slowly, then peaks in. And as soon as he's got your attention, he'll open the door all the way and say hello.

"Hello, Patrick," he said. Another thing with Brendon is that he seems to have a very happy voice all the time.

"Hey,"

"So, um, Pete left yesterday,"

"I know," I say barely loud enough for him to hear.

"You alright? Are you sad about it?"

You know I just forgot that Brendon never found out about me and Pete's relationship. I guess now that Pete left it would be safe to tell.

"Yeah, a little,"

Brendon came over and had a seat next to me.

"You miss him, huh? I do too. You already know, but we're pretty good friends, too,"

"Yeah, but me and Pete's relationship was different,"

"I know, it's different because everyone seemed to know him differently,"

"But.. When I say relationship, I mean that.. We were going out,"

"Ohh I didn't know that,"

I nod silently.

"Man that makes it even more sucky, doesn't it,"

I nod again.

He sat and thought for a second. "Well you know, I think this would be a good thing to motivate us,"

"What do you mean?"

"It'll motivate us because the sooner we can get you out, the sooner you can see Pete,"

"Well there's one thing."

"What?"

"Well I've brought this up with Pete a couple times, but I don't know if I'll ever get better,"

"Patrick, I know. This condition is a really hard one to get over, but I can promise you this okay? We will get you to the point where you can return home and see your family again,"

I smile a little. Kinda forced but kinda real.

Pete's POV

Today was pretty odd. The new California house is weird. Don't get me wrong, it's a cool house, definitely worth the money my parents spent. I just don't feel right here, this isn't my home. I mean, I'm only gonna be here until I can get a job or something and move into an apartment. Probably back in Chicago. California is expensive.

Anyway, the weather is "nice". Pollution is always lovely.

At the same time though, overcast is good. A thick layer of gray clouds in the sky. I've always kinda been a rainy-day kid.

I lay down on my bed. And stare at me phone for a while, wondering if I should give the ward a call. I start to wonder if Patrick is mad at me. It doesn't seem like he would be, but I start feeling anxious about it.

I call Brendon's cell instead.

"Hello?" He said. He's always quick to pick up the phone.

"Hey Brendon, it's Pete,"

"Oh hey Pete! How's it going in California?"

I smile, "It's good, thanks for asking, how are you?"

"Great man,"

"That's good," he's always a happy guy.

"Hey, so, Patrick told me something today," he said out of nowhere.

"What?"

"Well he said that you and him were actually dating. Is this true?"

"Yeah it is,"

"Yeah, he seemed pretty bummed out today by your leaving,"

"Yeah.. I was afraid he would be. Man, I really wish there was something I could do for him,"

"I understand,"

I think for a second.

"You know Brendon, don't worry about it, I'll figure it out,"

"You sure?"

"Yep,"

"Sounds good then," I hear a door open in the background of the call, "look, I got an appointment with Tyler now, so I gotta go,"

"Alright, talk to ya soon,"

"Okay bye bye," he said.

Honestly it's gonna take a while for me to figure out what my plan is. And in reality, I'm so confused with my life now as it is. I gotta make money soon somehow.

The California sky isn't the same as Chicago. It's nice and all, but gives me a feeling of worry. I don't know why. It's too different.

Authors note

I don't know, I kinda feel like this story isn't as great as I had hoped it would turn out. I'll keep writing though :)

Xoxo