Don't take my memories~Drier

Chapter Twenty Five~On The Blackest Side Of Night

Drew's PoV
      The rest of my afternoon seemed to pass me by in a surreal blur, a series of events floating by abnormally quickly in my mind that didn't seem to make sense or have any order of chronology to them, just a familiar sense of dejavu. After the kiss, everything had happened so quickly, leaving me completely confused to my feelings or even my sense of direction. Just moments after me and Kier broke apart from our sweet kisses, the door to my hospital room had burst open to reveal Luke, who had a pure look of shock on his face to see me awake and sat up on the bed, talking as happily and as healthily as if nothing had happened. He had instantly called for the other doctors, contrary to my feeble protests, and my room had then been filled with awed doctors and nurses, who immediately swarmed around me to check how I was and offer their services, gently pushing Kier out of the way. They had remained in that annoying position for a good few minutes before Luke stated that I needed space and made them all leave the room, including Kier.

The next few hours had consisted of countless tests, interviews and more tests, all which seemed to pass me by in a blur, as my mind pined for Kier and tried to search for the many reasons behind our kiss, as well as asking the many questions that accompanied Kier's strange actions. Finally, Luke had realised his endless questioning was getting nothing out of me in my started I was ready for bed, and got some nurses to hastily escort me to my hospital room.

The more I thought about the kiss, the more made up and fantasised it became in my mind until, at one point, I began to question its reality entirely, wondering if it had merely been a coma induced dream, driven on by hormones. It would be much more explanatory. Every shred of evidence seemed to suggest towards my encounter being a dream, yet something in my mind told me different. It had seemed so real, and every time I closed my eyes, trying to find sleep and a dream as sweet as the one I believed I had just had, I could feel his lips working mine, his breath hitting my face gently in soft billows as his hands encircled my fragile waist, pulling me tight into his embrace. The feeling of it seemed so familiar, so realistic, yet the moment I opened my eyes, it all dissipated before my eyes and I found myself locked inside the same blank hospital room I found myself in every night, with no sign of any other human life, let alone Kier.

I refused to believe it was real. If it was real, that would just permit me to gain hope again, and then my expectations would rise up as high as towers, looking strong and defiant in my mind, as though they could withstand any force without and survive any siege without so much as a scratch along the carefully structured stone. But the come morning, things will have let have gone back to how they used to be or Kier would rush to my room to inform me that the kiss had been a mistake, and my walls would crumble horribly around me and my people, leaving us exposed to the brutal attackers without and their sharp, brutal weapons that screamed for our blood. My blood.
I wanted nothing more than for that kiss to have been a childish dream, so that no one would get hurt. Yet I wanted it to be true as well. I was scared of what would happen if it was, yet I was scared of what would happen if it wasn't more. I was scared of change, lest it brought me more sorrow, yet the thought of nothing changing terrified me more. I couldn't keep living with things the way they were, my suicide attempt proved that. I was unhappy and unsettled living like this, and Kier was my only solace. His company was the only thing that kept me going. If that disappeared, or he proved not to feel the same way as me, it would only end in disaster. One day or another, if Kier didn't love me, he would love another, and they would drag him away from me, demanding all his attention.

That thought angered me than it should.

I couldn't sleep that night. My room was too hot and I was too restless to dream, making it too hard to stay still on the bed for over a moment. As the night grew on, a storm brewed without the hospital window, first announced by a clap of thunder in the distance at about one o'clock in the morning, which startled me fully awake just as I had almost drifted off. After that, the restless sounds of the nights weather grew louder outside, and my room only seemed to get hotter.