Life After Mockingjay

Chapter Forty Two; From Beginning To Our Happy Ending

I pull Peeta close to me as we sit in front of our eight year old daughter. She looks nervous, biting her nails as she looks around the room. Peeta places his hand on her knee, squeezing it. "We want to answer your questions, Willow," I whisper soothingly.

She nods, seeming to grow more comfortable as she shifts in her chair. I look over to Peeta, and he nods to me. "Willow, you know I get nightmares. You know that we played a role in the hunger games, but there is more you need to know," I start. "When I was sixteen and your father was seventeen, we were both reaped for the hunger games. The hunger games was a terrible thing made by the Capitol. It forced kids to kill each other in an arena filled with 24 reaped 'tributes.'"

"You told me that already," she interrupts, looking bored. God, sometimes I wish she wasn't so much like me, because she definitely has my stubborn attitude.

"The games hurt us in many ways, Willow," I whisper. As soon as she notices my change in tone, she becomes more serious and concerned.

"President Snow, Panem's leader hated your mom and I, because we both survived the hunger games. There was only supposed to be one victor." Peeta says, squeezing me tightly. "He decided that he wanted the both of us dead, and to do that, he forced us into the hunger games again."

"I thought after you won, you never went in again!"

"Yes, that is true, Willow," I murmur. "However, the 75th hunger games was... special. It was the year of the quarter quell. Snow decided that the tributes would be reaped from the existing pool of victors."

She simply nods, letting me explain further.

"Your father and I met a lot of people during the quell, two of which were Johanna and Finnick. Finnick is Finn's dad that died." My voice trails off for a moment, and I choke back tears. "What your father and I didn't know, was that there was a plan to get one of us out. That one person was me. After I shot an arrow at the top of the arena, everything blacked out. I was saved by the people in district 13."

"What happened to Dad? Why would you just leave him?" Willow asks, her face looking completely mortified. She shakes her head, looking at the ground. "A boy in my class told me that his parents told him that you never loved Dad. They said that everything was a lie. That's true, isn't it?" She begins crying hysterically, pushing me away as I try to calm her.

"Willow, please," I whisper. "This is hard for us too. I love your dad very much. I wanted him to be saved, not me. I would've died for him." I don't realize I'm crying too. Peeta wraps his arms around me, kissing my temple. I press my head against his chest.

"Willow," Peeta whispers. "Just let your mom finish. I know that when you hear the rest, you'll understand."

She looks up at him, tears streaming down her face. She sniffles, shivering as she attempts to calm herself.

"After finding out that your dad wasn't rescued with me, I couldn't seem to do anything. I couldn't eat or sleep, and I didn't want to live. I had nightmares every night, and all I wanted was him back. I realized that I couldn't live without him. So when Coin, the president of District 13 asked if I would be their Mockingjay, the leader of the rebellion, I demanded that they save him from the Capitol." I pause for a moment, catching my breath. Willow seems to be calming a bit, not looking at me as if I'm a monster anymore. "What I didn't know, was that now that I survived the quarter quell, Snow was willing to do anything to kill me. He knew that your dad was who I loved most, so he began to torture him. He gave him tracker jacked venom, and changed all of his memories of me. He made me seem as if I was a monster. It's called hijacking. That is why sometimes, he isn't himself. That's why at times, he wants to hurt me."

I look towards Peeta, who looks as if he is ready to cry also. He gives me a reassuring rub on my thigh, and begins to speak.

"When I was finally rescued, the only thing I wanted to do was kill your mom. It wasn't me, though. I was transformed into a mutt... A genetically engineered creature that had the sole purpose to kill. But with a lot of help from my friend Delly, your mom, the doctors in district 13, and even your aunt Prim, I got much better. I was able to fight with your mom in the rebellion."

"While fighting though, a man that I used to call my best friend had a very bad plan, that hurt a lot of innocent people. It even killed my sister, Prim." I whisper, staring towards the ground. At that point, the war was over. President Snow surrendered, and it was time for me to kill him. However, President Coin wanted to make another hunger games. She was turning out to be just like President Snow. So when the time was right, I decided against killing Snow. I killed Coin instead."

"Why would you do that? I thought President Snow was the bad one." Willow whispers, obviously confused.

"I knew that Snow would be killed by someone else, just not me. So afterwards, I moved back home with Haymitch, and Paylor became president. Then, when your dad came home, my life was better. We grew together again, got married, and eventually, we had an amazing little baby named Willow."

Willow smiles, coming over and hugging both of us. "I'm sorry I got mad at you, Mom, I was just confused. I'm not now. I understand everything now."

"You're not scared of us, are you, little bird?" Peeta asks worriedly.

"Of course not. You're my parents. I love you."

I let out a sigh of relief, smiling at her words. "We love you too, Willow."