In Love With My Gay Friend (EDITING)

Chapter eleven

Chapter eleven

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JOEY LERMAN POV

        Andee, you're a bastard.

        I was covering my mouth the whole time, pushing, bumping and squeezing my way out from the house. I was trying my best to gather my shíts up but it was sort of difficult especially when you know you were trying to run away from someone.

        I shook my head in disbelief.

        The memory made me want to puke. And so I did the moment I reached the lawn. Maybe it was the drink. Added the fact that I saw Andee sharing some intimate kiss (was it French?) with some girl.

        The guy was Andee. I was sure of it. But I thought he'd be different than any other guy.

        Don’t believe at prince in a shining armor. That idea will only pull you down.

        I gasped and felt another sickening taste about to come out of my mouth. I vomited again. I felt disgusted.

         Andee was gay (was he?). Why would he kiss someone? Why of all people, it turned out to be a girl. Was he drunk? Was he on drug or something? Was the girl kissed him? Why would he even kiss her back?

        I stopped my thoughts when I felt another faint feeling on my throat. I looked around the house.

        Where was Ellis? Where the hell did she go? I wiped my mouth and spat. I tucked my hand into my armpit and the other still holding my mouth.

        Who's the girl he was kissing? Why is he... kissing her? I wanted to know her name. I felt like I somewhat know her. Her face. Come on, Joey! Think.

        When I finally thought that at the moment I couldn’t I noticed I was already panicking.

        Ellis! Where the fck are you? 

        I jumped when someone grabbed my wrist. It was Andee. His face was covered with surprised and panic. His hair was ruffled, like he ran his fingers along them dozens of times (Or maybe it was the girl’s doing). His lips were flushed and really red. A red spot was slowly appearing at his neck. I made a face, pulling my wrist away from him.

        “Is that a hickey?” I spat.

        He looked at me, baffled before reaching a hand on his neck and shook his head. He cussed. “No, no! Shít, fck me.” He shouted after. He looked shít and messed up and just fcked up.

        He took a step and I stepped back. He looked at me surprised. I shook my head and felt my eyes stinging. I didn't want to look at him any further. I might just slap him.

        "Joey! I can explain!" I just glared at him. After a short while I glanced down.

        "Don’t explain. Just leave me alone." I said firmly.

        "It's not what you think... It was just..." He sighed, his voice was shaking.

        "I know what I saw." I said. He paused and I could feel his gaze on me. “You, what, sharing some intimate kiss with,” I kept my shit together. “With someone I bet you don’t even know.” I half-whispered.

        He was apologizing. “I’m sorry. I fcked up. I know. I’m sorry.” He said again. “I’m just, fck. I’m sorry. You’re right. She,” he pointed a trembling finger back at the house. “was just a girl I met yesterday and she meant nothing. Okay? She was nothing. She kissed me and that’s it. So what? It’s nothing. I could kiss anyone here, right now. If that’s what it takes to make you believe me.”

        I shook my head and a tear escaped. I wiped it away instantly. “That’s the point, Andee.” I couldn’t almost trust my voice. “It hurts to think that you can just give your kisses to people like a pathetic person you are. But what shít hurts most was the idea that you failed to see that I believe you. But kissing more people just to prove your point do no way makes me want to believe you more."

        My heart started to hurt more when I saw Andee’s face. I wanted to say sorry but it was the truth. And someone had to slap some sense to one to keep him awake from the reality.

        Why was I feeling like my chest was about to explode? Oh, wait. I felt this once. The flashbacks started to appear in my head.  It was slowly appearing, clearer and clearer.  And it was the same moment when I broke up with Kirk.

        But, it was me who's walking out now. I guess Andee felt the same way I felt before.

        I walked away and spotted Ellis talking to another guy with a drink in her hand. She looked at me in surprised. 

        I wonder why she was shock. I looked at myself. And felt my eyes burning. Fck. I absolutely began to cry now. I wiped it away and heard Ellis cursed. She tossed her drink to the guy beside her and ran near me.

        "What the fuck, Joey? Who did this to you?" she muttered, throwing her hands in my shoulders. I gazed at her hazel eyes and wiped the tears away.

       "Andee was there..." Ellis assisted me to my car and I took the driver's seat.

       "What? Where?" She asked, incredulously.

       "Upstairs. Kissing somebody." I just sat inside the driver's seat, buckling my seatbelt and then leaned over the wheel.

        "What? Are you for real?" Ellis exclaimed.

        I sighed and gave her an exasperated nod.

        Her mouth dropped open. There was a pause. She closed her mouth and chewed her lower lip.

        "Where do we go now?" She asked after a beat.

        "Home.” I sighed, exhausted. “I just want to rest. That's all." I started the engine and fixed the rear mirror. I shut my eyes and slammed my head to the head-rest I breathed out and drove slowly away.

        As I drove my way out of there with Ellis, I decided to text Beth later and tell her that we went home earlier than what we agreed, lying once again to her. I formulated some excuses to make if ever she'd ask why. She'd probably understand me if I told her that Ellis got crazy or I got drunk or an emergency came, anything. I had to say anything but the truth.

        Driving with this stupid headache was probably the most damn way to die. But I always dreamt of dying on a garden. Dying beautifully, perhaps.

        No one even dared to cut the silence. We were both thinking.

        My eyes quickly shifted and focused on the road, trying to reign over my drunk arse, pissed brain and broken heart.

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