What Would Happen?

Part 14: Response

Don't play the video yet, not till i say so.

"Marissa...I like you. Wanna go out?"

"W-what? I-I've got to get to class, Ethan." I said with my bright red cheeks.

"Marissa, please don't run away from this. I've liked you for the longest time. I know you were aware of that and I also know you had feelings for me. So please answer." He squeezed my arm even tighter.

Now you can play the song. (Keep the ringer for notifications on. Don't keep it on silent or you can't hear the song, if using a phone or tablet)

"Please..not now...not now of all times. When my heart is suddenly not having feelings for you! I don't want to leave you hanging there because I know it hurts and it just gives you more false hope! I know that but..please....not now..." I pleaded. My voice cracked, my eyes were red.

Ethan stood next to me, losing his grip on my arm as his eyes widened with shock. I was already late for class but I didn't care much anymore. The only reason I ran down the stairs was so he wouldn't see my crying face. It was also because I didn't want to see him after he was heartbroken. I know what face he would make it would be too painful to see it. "God, Buddha, please.....don't let me live in pain....don't ruin the life that I have tried so hard to hold onto."

My teacher was more concerned over the fact that I was bawling my eyes out during math class than the fact that I was late. Since my math teacher was pretty cool, he let me off the hook.

Throughout the day, My mind kept recalling the feeling of hindrance that that confession brought. Though, I knew it wasn't the confession but how I was going to respond. My heart hurt thinking about it. I didn't know if it was for my love for Ethan or my pain for trying to tell him.

By the end of the school day, I came back to the roof and waited there, figuring that he would come back. I waited until I was hungry and sleepy. I told my mom that the volley ball club was celebrating the captain's birthday. They really were so I was only half lying. She was reluctant but she believed me. I felt so guilty. I waited for another hour or so and the rooftop door finally creaked open. The one standing there was Ethan.

I cried so much my throat didn't allow me to croak even one word. It hurt so much.

"Marissa. Please tell me."

"I...love you but I don't know what's going on with my heart. It's...acting too fragile...I just cant say I'm your girlfriend."

"Then I will wait. For five years. For ten. For my whole life. No matter how long it takes you to love me again, enough for your heart to sting, then I'll wait."

I crawled into his shoulder and I screamed in pain. I cried tears of guilt.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, Ethan. Thank you...thank you for waiting.....I.." My voice shook.

I waited until my face and voice were normal to call my mom to pick me up. I told her to be by the school and gave her the excuse that I was afraid she was going to get lost.

That night, I swore that I would never lie to her again. I was too guilty, no, too disgraceful to be called her daughter. That night was also the night that I told myself I wouldn't actually fool myself that I was in love with Ethan until I seriously fell for him again.

I wonder if I'll ever regret the decision I made.