Love, Cancer, and Me // Book 1 // Brendon Urie

Chapter 22: Letting Out Feelings

~Addilyn's POV~

   People kept knocking on my door, but I just ignored them. It's been two days already and I've been in my room crying and hating myself. "Addilyn, open up or I'm busting down the door." That neither of my parents' voices. It was Breezy's. "Please open up, sweetie. Your parents and I are worried." I don't answer. Then, I hear Breezy say thank you and suddenly the door opens. I don't look up.

   "Honey, what's wrong? You've been locked in your room for 2 days." It was my mom. I felt pairs of hands on me. Lifting my head up, I see my mom and dad hugging me and Breezy sitting across from me with a saddened look.

   "Tell us what happened," said my dad. I listened to him and I finally spoke.

   "I went over to B-Brendon's house... and found glass and beer bottles... e-everywhere. I found Brendon on the floor in his room c-crying and I felt so... guilty. He wouldn't talk or move... for a while. I asked him if he wanted me to leave and he s-shook his head, so I stayed and... helped clean him up. Then, B-Brendon realized I was tired... so he asked me if I wanted to go to sleep on his bed and all. W-We fought over sleeping on either the couch or the bed, so we decided just to sleep on the bed t-together. N-nothing happened, just to let you know. Anyway, I woke up and didn't see B-Brendon. I started too panick and I found him sitting at his kitchen table with b-beer bottles surrounding him. I tried to take the beer bottle away from him and he-he slapped my hand." I started to cry really hard now. Soon, Breezy came over and started to comfort me. "Brendon told me it was my fault Sarah left him and before I could say sorry, he p-pushed me to the ground. He told me to shut the fuck up and get out, so I did."

   "I'm going to yell at that young man for the way he treated you!" My dad yelled, he was furious.

   "No! Dad, it was my fault."

   "Darling, this wasn't any of your fault." I just ignored my mom.

   "Addy-" Right, when she mentioned my nickname, I was balling. That's what he called. I know he defiantly won't be calling me that anymore. "I'm sorry. Addilyn, he was drunk. Brendon didn't mean any of that."

   "I know he was drunk, but he probably did mean it!"

   "I can assure you he didn't," stated my father.

   "Yes! He! Did!"

   "How about we go for a ride?" Breezy asked, helping me up.

   "Fine." Breezy smiled and my parents hugged me again before I left. We got into the car and I had no clue where we were going. Breezy turned on the radio and guess who was playing on the radio. Ding! Ding! You guessed it. The song was "Impossible Year".

   "For fuck's sake!," I yelled, shutting off the radio.

   "Where do you want to go?"

   "I don't really care," I responded.

   "Chick-Fil-A?" I remembered how Brendon bought me Chick-Fil-A. I started to cry. "Goddammit, I'm sorry. How about Starbucks?" I cried even more. "Shit. Um, McDonalds?"

   "That's fine. I'm sorry, I'm acting like a baby."

   "Oh Addilyn, no your not. I would be acting the same way, trust me."

   "So, how's Dallon and the kids?"

   "Dallon is great, he's been teaching the kids how to play the bass. Amelie and Knox are doing great too. They're doing very well in school and I couldn't be more proud of them. Thanks for asking by the way! How are your parents?"

   "Your family is like goals." Breezy laughed. "Well, my parents are way better than before. I wished that my dad would just stop smoking though. I asked him several times and he always ignored me. The doctor even told him to stop, but he just won't listen. It's affecting his health so badly."

   "Don't worry. He'll stop, I know he will." She gave me a kindhearted smile and I smiled back. I'm glad I accepted her off to go for a drive. We arrived at McDonald's and ordered our food. "Addilyn, this is just a question, but do you like Brendon?"

   "You mean like-like?" Breezy nodded her head.

   "I-I don't know. I mean there has been times I just wanted to kiss him, but again I don't know. Besides, he wouldn't want to date a cancerous girl like me."

   "Hmm, you never know." After that, we just sat in the parking lot and talked.

   "Thank you for doing this for me Breezy. You made me feel so much better!"

   "No problem! That's what best friends are for!" Then, we just hugged. I'm so glad I'm friends with Breezy.