The Russian

Chapter Forty: Accident

Being trapped in a box was not the worst thing ever. The silence was comforting, and food wasn't half bad. But the ones I was bonded with were hurting. I felt the ache and the hurt. Steve's pain was the one that stung the most.

I felt his worries and fear. It didn't help that Bucky was on his mind as Sam searched for him. The team has been going on missions which helps distract, but Steve wasn't focused. His nightmare kept replaying in my head. 

It was like a video stuck on a loop. It starts with him when he is younger, a scrawny little Steve. He is sitting on a bed, his skin sunk in to see all his bones. He tells this woman a story. Her long brown hair was splattered all over as her weak face gives him a smile. Her blue eyes water as her grip on his hand begins to fall. He begins to yell and cry for help, only to have people rip him away and be alone.

Then its  him stand over two graves, only Bucky there with him. His face is solum, and out of tears. The graves were broken, one had dying flowers scattered on it. That is where Steve's dull eyes looked to. Sarah was scratched into the stone. Bucky put his hand on Steve's shoulder, only to have Steve shrug it off and walk away.

Within a blink of an eye, metal tracks flew past. Steve was bigger, more buff. His patted hand reached over the snowy cliff. He could hear the metal creak as the weight of his best friend pulled on the thin pipe. As he yells for him to reach,  the metal creaks, making the pipe collapse. He watches as his best friend falls into cold air, screaming as he falls for miles. The screams echoes as he blames himself and weeps to himself.

But the sight that stares at him on the ship filled with guns and betrayal, is what the nightmare truly made him feel the pain. There stood two people I cared for, that didn't know who he was or what they actually stand for. But he watched as someone he has helped for a long time, lived with and shared emotion with, become cold and a killer.

He watched at the girl he saw stood at the corpse of the girl's sister. He heard both of them scream for him, but by the time he finds them it is too late. That's when the horror sets in. Thats when his life spins of failures and pain. 

And I hear it.

I pace when it starts, and I'm locked up so I can't do much.

"Mik, you okay?" I hear Banner ask over the speaker. I look up at the camera and I shake my head. I can feel some tears fall.

"No." I croak as I sink to the floor. "I screwed up, and he is hurting for it."

"Who?"

"Go wake up Steve. He is having a nightmare, and I can hear it." I say as The tears fall more. Soon a door opens, and I feel the warm arms hold me and begin to Rock. A Russian lullaby is what Natasha hums in my ear. She holds me close as I cry. 

"He's awake now, Its okay." Natasha says softly. Her soft hands stroke my ratty blonde hair. Her heart beat calms me as I lean my head over her heart. "You are okay, you are safe."

"My hands are still Black. I screwed up. I killed innocent people." I say as I hold her arm close.

"It takes time, дорогой." She coos. "Why don't you come out and join us? It could help."

"I will hurt people." I whimper. The fear then released smoke out of my hands, making me back away from Natasha as fast as possible. "Stay away from me."

"You can control it." Natasha said. I shook my head and pushed my hands out to keep he away, and ended up sending her across the room. I looked at myself in horror then at Natasha. She was leaning back in pain.

"CLINT! STEVE! HELP!" I scream. Clint, Bruce, Tony and Steve burst through the door. Bruce looks over Tash, seeing any injuries hat had to take care of now. Clint and Tony carry her out with Bruce following behind. Steve stands in the room and looks at me. 

"Mika, snap out of it." He growls.

"I can't." I whimper.

"Knock it off, grow up and get over it!" He barked. I scooted back in fear. I have never heard him like this. "You hurt people Mika! You hurt Natasha, who practically raised you!"

"I'm s-"

"And Amira is missing! Your sister! Remember! It all started with Tyler!" He shouted. I closed my eyes and covered my ears. "You are a monster Mika! You are nothing to me!"

"STOP IT!" I screeched. I heard the glass breaking. I look up to see everyone staring at me with confusion.  Natasha was fine, with no damage and Steve didn't look mad at all just upset. "I am sorry, I'm sorry Steve please I am sorry."

That's all I said, over and over again. I sobbed and said I was sorry.

Because it was an accident