Things To Say Before I Go

Chapter 1: Jess

"Oh, damnit!" I heard my keys fall to the pavement, but I couldn't see them in the dark, which was just my luck. 

It was 9:00pm on Valentine's Day and here I was, just outside my house in Lower Manhattan fumbling for my keys in the dark like an idiot while Brett had probably prepared something beautiful and romantic. I had told him that I was going to be late, but my initial approximation was around 7:00. Now, two hours late, I felt terrible just picturing him waiting around, wondering where the hell I was. In an effort to do SOMETHING to make up for the extra two hours, I had stopped by the drug store on the way home to grab some chocolate, and then stopped by the Fine Wine & Good Spirits (located right next door, which really seems like a messed up idea seeing as prescription drugs and alcohol should NEVER mix) and snagged a bottle of wine. 

Finally finding my keys, I made my way up the concrete steps and jimmied my key into the lock. The house was mostly dark, lit only by a few spare candles when I walked in. There were rose petals on the floor that looked like they lead a trail around the place. Now I really felt horrible that I was home so late. God knows how long he planned this and how long it took him to set it up. 

I followed the flowers around, going into the kitchen and seeing two place settings at the dining table and my favorite meal from the barbecue place on 45th street, Ol' Rays: smoked baby back ribs with a honey barbecue glaze. There was also an opened bottle of wine, with the cork laying beside it and the glass I assume he used still with a little wine in it. It looked like he must have eaten already when he realized how late I was going to end up being. 

The flowers then lead from the table to the freezer. Every new place in this little journey was making my heart sink into my stomach more and more. I opened the door and saw two pints of Ben & Jerry's ice cream of our favorite flavors. He loved Half Baked and I couldn't resist Phish Food. Looks like he had thought of everything. 

There was a note sitting on top of the ice cream that read, 'Just as sweet as you are'. 

"Fucking hell," I muttered under my breath, frustrated with myself that I let him wait this long when he had gone to all of this trouble. Here I was witnessing all the things he had done for me to make this night special and I couldn't even get home on time. I could imagine him sitting at the table wondering where I was and watching the food he bought go cold, everything he did going to waste. 

Closing the freezer door, I followed the continuing trail into the living room. He had left two spoons on the coffee table so we could eat our ice cream in there while watching the movies he had pulled out from the movie case, which were two of our favorites. He suffered his way through the The Devil Wears Prada because to me, Meryl Streep is a badass in that film, and I somehow make it through Speed for the four thousandth time. He also had taken out The Blind Side because it was the only movie we could always agree to watch. 

Trying not to hate myself any further, I went back to the kitchen, put my purse, the chocolate and the wine down on the island and followed the rest of the trail which lead upstairs. Dejected, he was probably already in bed. I slowly climbed the stairs, not wanting to make too much noise in case he was already asleep. 

As I got closer to the cracked open bedroom door and the trail of petals continued to lead me to it, I started to hear something that made me stop in my tracks. I heard his voice as if he was talking to someone. Now, I would understand if it was someone on the phone because he was upset at how late I was and needed someone to talk to, but this didn't sound like that. I couldn't make it out what he was actually saying but he didn't sound upset, like I expected he would. 

So, in the dark with only the light of a couple of candles at the top of the stairs between the bedroom and the bathroom to light my way, I made my way to my bedroom door and peered through the crack. What I saw made me lose my balance and fall, pushing the door wide open and scaring the shit out of Brett and my boss, Melanie. Looking through the crack in the door, I had seen Brett rutting like a pig on top of my boss, who had saddled me with so much work that I had to stay later, so that I didn't get home until 9:00. So, while she was making me stay late, she left on time to go screw my boyfriend.