Things To Say Before I Go

Chapter 4: Nate

"And this is how you enter the server," Mr. McDonald instructed. 

He was an incredibly tall, lanky man with gray hair that was quickly receding and a boring, droning voice. He didn't strike me as one of those people that got excited about much. Plus, when he talked, it felt like he was giving a dissertation. It was like he loved the sound of his terribly dull voice. While he was doing things in the computer that I didn't care to pay attention to, I scanned the office in a weak attempt to get to know my environment a little more. I saw a bunch of people in various cubicles hard at work. You could heard people typing away, the copier in the corner churning out papers rapidly and two women chatting quickly by the water machine. 

I felt really out of place standing up behind Mr. McDonald as he attempted to show me the basics of the system. It was like all eyes were on me. The new guy. Suddenly, I felt conscious of the fact that the suit I was wearing didn't fit quite right. It was getting a little loose on me, but with the added pressure I was feeling, it felt like it was twenty sizes too big and was goofily hanging off my body. Find a distraction, Nate. It's all in your head, just get your mind off of it. 

I chanced a look out the window and realized how close we were to the building next to us. I could see into it and the people working on the ninth, tenth and eleventh floors. It was at this moment that I noticed her.

She was sitting at the same position I was on this floor, but in the other building, obviously. She had dark brown hair with slight blonde streaks that she had tied up in a ponytail. She had a simple blouse and skirt combo on and was clearly frustrated with something. By chance, she glanced my way and quickly looked away when we made eye contact. It was like she knew I was staring at her. I found myself smiling too, seeing how embarrassed she looked. She was attractive, I wasn't going to lie. 

My focus on her was broken however, when Mr. McDonald stood up, saying, "And that should just about do it! Think you've got the hang of it?" 

I snapped back to attention. "Yeah, I think I should be good. Thanks sir." I don't know why I said this to him. I hadn't paid any attention to a single thing, but I opened my big mouth and made it sound like I had this thing down pat. 

He smiled. "Good. It's nice to have you on board, Mr. King," he said with the most enthusiasm I think he could ever muster, which wasn't much at all. He slapped me on the back and grabbed a file from a nearby desk. "And here you go! This is your first assignment." 

He handed me the Manila folder and left me to figure it out for myself. He had said, "The only way to learn is by doing it yourself." I scoffed at that idea, in all honesty. Since I wasn't really paying attention, I begged to differ that I would learn by doing it myself. In any case, I sat down and attempted to dig into the folder and its contents as best as I could. Let's just say, it didn't go so well.

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By the end of my first day, I was exhausted. I walked out the door and was immediately consumed within the highway that was a New York City sidewalk. People racing up and down the sidewalk without a single thought as to anybody that might be in the way. With a sigh and a shake of my head at the man race, I started my lonely walk back to my apartment when I saw tenth floor girl walking a couple yards ahead of me. I felt the urge to call after her, but then I thought, You idiot, you don't know her name! What are you going to scream, 'hey you!'?  Yeah, you won't sound like a serial killer or anything, Nate. What a brilliant plan. Dumb ass. 

Needless to say, I watched in silence as she hailed a cab and left me standing there feeling like I still missed an opportunity. When I finally made it back to my apartment, the only thing I wanted to do was sit down and relax. The stress from my first day was emotionally draining and all I needed was a cold beer. I grabbed one from the fridge, loosened my tie and turned the TV on. I wanted it all to melt away.