I Can't Live Without You (Ignazio Boschetto)

Part 12

"Piero, please talk her through this. She'll listen to you." I can hear his words from the outside. He's been asking to go home since he woke up and none of us, including the doctors, think it was a good idea.

"She is right, Igna. You're not strong enough. You better stay for a couple more nights, just to make sure..." The rest of the conversation was in Italian. I don't understand a single word except when they mention some names. But judging from their tone, I know they were talking about some serious stuff.

I let myself into the room after they finished. Both of them look at me when I open the door. "Morning, guys."

"Morning, amore," he said signaling me to come closer to him.

"I think I'm gonna go home. I'll come again tonight." Piero said. He grabbed his jacket and left the room.

***

So yes, this afternoon, we decided to take Ignazio home. Not because we wanted to, but because he insisted. He said that he won't eat his food or take his meds as long as he's in the hospital. Very childish, indeed, but there was nothing else we can do. He is very stubborn and we know he was serious about what he said so we don't want to take any risk.

Gianluca was waiting in the car while Piero took care of the paperwork, leaving me with Ignazio in his room. He changed to the clothes I brought him, it was a white shirt, a pair of black trousers and a pair of white tennis shoes, his favorite one. The smile on his face was getting bigger when he saw Piero entering the room.

"Are we good to go?" he asked, not be able to hold back the excitement.

"Don't get all cheered up on me, Igna." Piero glared at him. "We do this because you threatened us." Ignazio laughs, but none of us follow.

There was no conversation on our way back to Ignazio's house. I still mad at him for being childish and didn't care about his health. Both Piero and Gianluca might feel the tension between us so they are being quiet as well.

"It's a perfect time to see the sunset. Anyone wants to go to the beach?" he asked, but none of us answer his question. "What if going to the beach is my last wish?" he said, casually.

"Don't say that!" the three of us respond at the same time. Piero was even raising his voice. We were so shocked by his last statement.

"See, you guys finally say something." he looks out to the window, didn't care about what he has done to us. I began to wonder, what if he's right. What if we're not able to fulfill his last wish?

We finally arrived at the beach. It seems like Gianluca has changed our destination without us knowing. Both Piero and I didn't complain. It turns out that the three of us have the same thought.

"The beach!" he screamed in excitement like a kid in the candy shop. He was smiling ear to ear and began to walk slowly to the water. "Grazie Gianluco!"

I run to catch him while the boys stay in the car and observe us. I approached him who was standing at the golden sand barefoot and let the water wet his foot. I remember his smile when we went to the beach the first time. I see the same smile right now, and it made me so happy. We hold each other's hand and he led me to the big rocks that we discovered not so long ago. Instead of climbing up, we decided to just sit there and wait for the sunset.

"Sorry for giving you guys troubles." He said trying to open a conversation. He turns his head on me and I can see guilty on his face.

"I take your apology." I respond, "But I just want you to know that we want the best for you." I stopped, realized that I was being too hard on him. He didn't respond with words, he just put both of his legs on his chest and wrapped his arm around it.

"The first time the doctor said it was inoperable, I just want to give up." his voice shaky like he was about to cry. "Then I remember you. I can't just give up because I have promised to protect you. That's when I agree to try the chemo even though I know it was useless." tears start running down his cheek. I was speechless, I can't do anything but crying. "You are my strength, Amore." he continued.

"But now, I don't know what to do anymore. I'm scared. I've never felt this way before... and it scares the shit out of me." he began to buried his face in between his legs and started to sob. It was the first time I see him break down like that. I hug him. I hug him tight and let him cry on my shoulder. There wasn't a single comforting word coming out of my mouth, like the one he always says to me when I cry, nothing.

"It's okay, Ignazio." I finally say something after a while. "You're allowed to be scared," I whisper. "It's okay to admit that we're not strong enough sometimes. It's okay to ask for help. We're all here to help." I paused, "You're not alone. You've got us."