Duty (An Armorer/Paladin Story)

The waiting game

I went back to my workshop and opened it up. I swept the chain mail samples into a drawer; just felt too frivolous to even think about with so much trouble around. Mr Pointy had been left on the porch along with DB and Martha, having had the mud cleaned off to make sure they were safe. There are amazing people working here. Either the mud or the cleaning had really faded the stain on Mr Pointy; I was going to have to redo it, but that would take a couple minutes of work, tops. The fans were in perfect condition.

I picked up my poleaxe and went out to whack at the tree some more. I had a pretty deep well of anger to fuel me and I stabbed and slashed with all my strength.

"Hey," someone said behind me, and I whipped around to see Bucky, looking pretty much inscrutable as usual. He nodded to the poleaxe. "Don't suppose you have another one?" Wordlessly, I went inside and grabbed the original weapon I'd been given, trotted down the porch steps, and tossed it to him. He caught it with ease, tested the balance, and attacked when he thought I wasn't ready. But I was. I was ready for him, and I'd watched enough videos of reinactments to know how to handle it. I was clumsy, as the tree didn't offer much in the way of a defense, but I was better than Bucky expected and I managed to surprise him by using the pole part to smack his hamstring and cause him to abandon an attack.

"You're better than you were," he said critically. I nodded.

After a few moments of silence, I said, "I had to use it."

He looked at me patiently. "Tell me." So I told him about trying to find the landslide, how I thought I was going to drown in the puddle, how I had to get up, and how it had ended.

"It's never easy for a good person to kill somebody," he said.

"Natasha said you get used to it." 

"I hope you don't," Bucky said, surprising me. "I'd hate to see you get... hardened." He hefted the poleaxe again and held it out; I took it and put them both in the workshop.  "Fury offered me a position here," he mentioned.

I sat down on the steps, offering him a towel, wiping my own face. "I thought he might, I just didn't expect it to be this soon. What was his offer?"

"When I'm ready, come out here. Join the Avengers. Be in charge of weapons training." He sat beside me.

"What do you think?" I asked.

"I don't know. I'm torn. I can be helpful here, but...I don't want to be here if Steve isn't."

"I understand. You don't need to answer right now though. You can take your time." I hesitated. "How's therapy going?"

He smiled, the first real one I'd seen this visit. "I just cut back from three appointments a week to one."

I grinned back. "That's really good news. Constance wouldn't have cut back if you weren't ready for it." At his look, I added, "We're friends, but she also treated me after my accident, so I have an understanding of what you're going through. It's not at all the same, but I know what it's like to do the work." I smiled. "She still talks me down occasionally." He nodded, and we just sat there for awhile as the shadows lengthened. "I need to go back to medical. You want to come?" I stood and gave him a hand up. We walked down to the clinic in peaceful silence.

We were just about to the clinic when he asked abruptly, "Why do you still work with Constance? I thought you were ok."

My smile was a little sour. "I didn't really want to do this Avenging thing, but there have been enough incidents that have convinced me that I'm safer here than anywhere. I didn't have a lot of choice in the matter, but there have been a couple of attempts to kidnap me. I can't go anywhere by myself these days, just in case. I always have to have at least one of the others with me, so I'm a little...I don't know what to call it. It's irritating and claustrophobic sometimes. And especially at the beginning, Stark and I were always at each others' throats. It wasn't physical, but it was the bare-knuckle verbal equivalent of a brawl, going after each other, hitting hard and as dirty as possible, trying to inflict maximum damage. Not pleasant for anybody. So she lets me vent, gives me support and constructive criticism." Bucky thought about this as we entered the facility. He went on ahead and I found Dr Rai for my instructions.