Trees

Biggest fear

~Josh~
Today Tyler and I have to go back to school. This is going to suck because everyone has seen the picture and everyone is gonna make fun of us.

I stood in the kitchen just staring at the wall when Tyler walked over to me. "are you scared?" He asked so I nodded "me too" he replied then hugged me. I hugged him back and hid my face in the crook of his neck.

Kelly walked in and looked at us. "Boys it'll be ok. You two have made it through so much together. Don't let this stop you" she told us so I looked up "this all happened because we are together" I told her then Tyler looked at me with fear in his eyes "Josh what are you saying?" He asked me "we shouldn't have come out to the school. We shouldn't have told people that we are dating. None of this would've happened" I told him straight up. "Josh. Please don't" he pleaded softly. "Tyler. I'm sorry. I just need a break right now" I told him and he looked like I just shot him. "Josh. You want to take a break from us?" He asked "I'm sorry Tyler" I replied then Kelly looked at me surprised. "Joshua, please don't do something you will regret" she told me and I just shook my head before walking out of the house.

Why did I do that? Why? I love Tyler. Why did I do that? This is a mistake. I can't talk to him now. He's probably pissed at me. God dammit! Why? Why Joshua? Why are you such a fucking idiot?

I walked into my house and completely broke down as soon as I shut the front door. I slid down the back of the door and cried into my knees.

My mom rushed over and crouched next to me. "Josh, sweetie what happened?" She asked "I didn't mean to. I still love him. I didn't mean to hurt him like this" I sobbed "sweetie what happened between you and Tyler?" She asked me and I shook my head. "I couldn't take the stress of going to school and I had an out burt and I accidentally broke up with Tyler" I cried and she hugged me. "Say you're sorry then" she told me. "He probably hates me. I can't" I sniffled then stood up. I went up to my room and laid in my bed. I'm not going to school today.

~Tyler~
I stood there with tears flowing down my cheeks as Josh walked out. "Tyler" mom started but I walked away.

I walked over to Zack and pinned him against the wall. "This is your fault! It's your fault that he broke up with me! It's your fault my life is ruined! You're an asshole! I hate you Zack! I hate you! You're not my brother!" I yelled in his face and my dad rushed over. He pulled me off of Zack and I didn't want to be held back. "You fucking asshole! You ruined my relationship so you could be popular!" I yelled then my dad took me up to my room.

I laid on my bed and sobbed. I can't anymore. This is all Zack's fault. I don't want to lose Josh. I can't. He didn't really mean it. Did he?

I told you that you aren't loved. Do it Tyler. It's time for the s word. Suicide.

I listened. I ran downstairs and through the house. "Tyler!" Mom yelled as I ran to the medicine cabinet. I opened the cabinet and grabbed a random bottle of pills. I opened it and dumped a bunch in my hand. "Tyler! No! Don't do it! Tyler please don't do it!" Mom begged in tears as she tried to take the bottle from me. "It's Zack's fault! This is Zack's fault!" I yelled before throwing the handful of pills in my mouth. I swallowed them and my mom sobbed.

I got dizzy really quickly before passing out. I heard my mother shriek in freight as I felt my head hit the cold tile.

~Josh~
I was up in my room when my mom appeared in my doorway. "Josh, we need to go" she told me so I looked up at her confused. "Josh, Tyler just tried to kill himself" she told me and I jumped up. I have to see him. I need to fix this.

We got to the hospital and I ran inside. I saw Kelly and Chris sitting in the waiting room with tear stained cheeks. They looked at me and I felt so bad. "I'm sorry. This is all my fault" I told them and Laura shook her head. "No, he didn't blame any of it on you. Josh, I know that what Zack did was hard on your relationship. We don't blame you" Laura told me so I nodded with bees flowing down my cheeks. They stood up and hugged me then I looked at them. "Do I still have permission to marry him if he wants?" I asked so they nodded. "Of course" Chris told me so I smiled slightly.

I sat down next to my mom and took a deep breath. I leaned my head back and stared at the ceiling. "Josh this isn't your fault. Don't be too hard on yourself" mom told me so I nodded. A nurse walked out and talked to Joseph's. They looked back at me and told me to go over to them. My mom followed and we were lead to where Tyler was.

We walked into the room and Tyler was  laying on the bed hooked up to an IV and oxygen. I immediately started crying.

"Tyler I'm so sorry. I didn't mean that. I don't know why I said it. Please. Please Tyler I need you. Don't die. I was freaking out because of going back to school. I love you Tyler. I love you so much. I'm sorry you're in pain. Please stay alive. I promise I will make sure you never feel pain again" I cried while holding his hand. I didn't even care that our parents are in the room. I love Tyler more than anything. I will die if he dies. He has to stay alive.

Stop begging Joshua. You deserve to be on a bed just like him. You're worthless. You did this to him.