Solitaire ✔

Chapter Twelve

Grind my knuckles on the temples. I fought hard with my tears. Her smiles, that were so angelic imprinted me on my heart. I was defeated. Crouched on the corner. My breath was hesitant. Grabbing my fist as I punched hard on the wall. I roared at the pain crawling deep in me.

She, of all cheated on me.

Even Grace's leave was just a stain. Like a scar built on after my wound. Grace gave me an innocent love and grabbed it away for some reason that I wasn't aware. I always thought that she was just somebody hard to reach and too lucky to have.

But Rachel was not. I felt it real with her. 

It was just too late to realise myself falling so deep for her. I thought I was just too used to her with me. That comfortable feeling I had with her, assuming of no passion. I assumed my heart was just too dead to love anyone.

Embracing myself while I feel the deep pain. I had her all this time and I didn't realise she was that important. I could have felt angry only with the truth exposed but sadness covered me as well.

"Chris..." A voice was heard from the other side. She was sobbing.

Did she realise that I had found out? She loved me so much but how could she have ...

I couldn't have forget that day. The day when Rachel stepped into life. She was in her white spaghetti long dress. Her smile was just like the sun. She embraced the sun light with me while we both sat on the beach. We both love sun-bathing. The conversation that we can share was endless.

It was just the two of us only.

She said before that she loved my broad shoulder. She said that she felt safe beside me. Like I was the mighty big tree that can shield her from anything.

I was amazed by her Asian look. She was far more than a plain-looking Chinese girl. Her eyes were so big and bright. I once heard that the normal Chinese girls would have a pair of small eyes and flat nose. Rachel was not, her features were sharp and deep. She had a Caucasian face features but with the Asian feel.

She was seating there with me like we were of any other weekends. Suddenly, a question popped from her.

"Did you have anyone you love?"

I was surprised but not being shocked. I knew she would ask because her feelings for me was too obvious. My scars were too deep that I didn't dare to be with anyone. Let alone Rachel who was too good to be true. I fear that she would run away with someone when she grew tired of me.

Assuming just friends would solve all the leaving sadness.

However, I looked at her eyes that day and replied. "I love your eyes."

She smiled and touched my hand, "Let me love you."

Now that I looked back at the memories, I could only scold myself silly. She had got me attracted to her since then and it was too late to tell her that I love her too.

Because she cheated on me...

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[Rachel POV]

I looked at the door. Touched the wooden texture, feeling with my palms. My eyes shut with tears rolling down my cheek. Imagining the man that were at the other side. He must be shocked at my background. He must be regretting to be with me.

"Chris..." Biting my lips as I stopped myself from voicing out.

My sobbing were too loud. Grabbing my chest as I knelt down outside Chris' room. 

It was just too late.

Breathing deeply as I brought myself up. Walking away back to my room.

It was too late.

Looking in the mirror at this face, I felt the shame drew on my face. Sighed at the helpless situation, I grabbed a tissue. Wiped my tear stain. I searched for a way to be save.

I should just go to work. At least at there where no one knows, I am still just Rachel.

My leg went forward to the handbag. Grabbing it as I moved out of the room. My steps froze. Turning around as I brought stares to the door that hasn't open since his return. Blinking back to reality for a inch of courage. I walked away and headed out.