On Command ~ Sequel to Lost Heros

Wrong Realizations

Three Days Later

I picked at my breakfast with a sick expression on my face. I wanted nothing more than to eat a full meal but ever since the phone call I've been a mess.
My nerves won't let me eat, I walk the halls of the base paranoid, and worst of all I can't stand to be near anyone. . . especially Bucky. His new arm got installed the other day and he's been wanting to do more things with me now that he has both use of his arms.

Sleeping in the same bed as him is torture. Every embrace weighs like bricks, every glance says a million words I can't respond to, and every kiss suffocates the precious air from my lungs. The very toxic air I'm being forced to breath is my only way to live.

I'm awake before everyone else even dreams of waking up. Bags under my eyes are just another accessory that I'll have to learn to pull off. As I shove more food down my throat a nauseous wave washes over me as I remember the man's voice over the phone. I tremble my way to the bathroom, something that is becoming more and more a daily routine, and my breakfast ends up being flushed away again.

The Nyx in my reflection is laughing at me. She looks at me with disgust and mocks my weakness. I stare into her dark eyes which say the words that used to be my toughest armor.

Serves you right for getting close to anyone.

     I leaned against the locked door and broke my composed facade that I put up during the day. My breathing labored and my shoulders slumped forward. In the mirror Nyx stood up much taller than me as if looking down on me.

Look at you, she says. Pathetic. There was a time where you wouldn't have cared whether a man lived or died. You can't even be called the shell of the great legend we once were.

The guilt propelled me to the toilet but with what use? There was nothing left to throw up.

Later that day

*Bucky's P.O.V*

     There were questions in each punch that I threw at the training bag.

Is it me?
Is it the new arm?
Did she regret that night?

I'm not blind. I can see that something is wrong with Claire. Her moves are unfocused, she can't finish a simple meal, and worst of all, since we had sex she can't spend more than half an hour in a room with me.
I know it's been a while since I've been with a woman but it couldn't have been that bad. . . Unless it was.

But then again, and not to brag, I can't imagine that she's been with anyone better recently. . . Unless she has.

That thought wasn't helping my current situation.

"Hey, Buck," said a familiar voice and I turned around from the punching bag. It was Steve with Sam trailing behind him slightly.
"Hey, guys," I responded and walked over to them.

Sam looked at me with a puzzling look, "Shouldn't you be with Claire, man?"
"What?" I asked. "She wasn't in bed this morning when I woke up. What happened to her? Is she okay?" My mind started to wonder to dark places.
Steve waved a hand in front of him, "She's fine, Bucky. Wanda found her this morning in the bathroom. She's just a little sick. We thought you knew."

I sighed and then turned back to my punching bag. "Yeah, lately Claire isn't in a really talkative mood."
Steve walked over to the other side of my bag and stopped it so I couldn't punch it anymore. I grunted in annoyance. "What happened? You two okay?" He asked.

"I don't know," I responded, running a hand through my sweaty hair. "She won't talk to me about anything."
"What do you mean?" Sam asked, crossing his arms. "Her mood's changed," I replied, "She throws up everything she eats and I'm worried that Claire can't stand to be with me anymore since w-" I stopped myself. This wasn't the conversation to have with her brother. But he caught on.
Stave raised an eyebrow, "Did you have an argument with her?" I shook my head, "No, it wasn't that."

Sam snorted from next to Steve and began to laugh. "So you slept with her," Sam pointed out smugly. Steve's jaw dropped and Sam laughed harder. I could only nod and hope my ears weren't too red.
"So you think she doesn't want to be with you after you slept together?" Sam asked. "I don't think that's it."

Steve mumbled something along the lines of 'fondue is a much better term' and looked uncomfortably at the floor. I almost started laughing as well.
"She loves you too much for it to be that. No matter how rusty you are," Sam continued. Steve and I almost choked on air if it were possible.

"Then why is she acting so strange all of a sudden?" I asked. Everyone stayed quiet for a while. But Sam's eyes widened in what I could only imagine was realization.

"She's pregnant!" He said smiling. "WHAT?!" Steve yelled loud enough for the both of us and looked at me with wide eyes.
"I mean I think," he added and turned to me. "Did you use protection?"

"OH MY GOD!" Steve yelled and paced around the room with his hands on his hips.

I didn't respond to Sam's question. I think the answer was pretty obvious.
"Then there you have it," Sam said, "You got Claire pregnant."

Steve stopped pacing and only stared. I felt a sudden wave of realization.

Why else would Claire be throwing up every meal and getting up so early? The answer was morning sickness.
Why was she being so fidgety? Because her moods have changed now that she's pregnant.
Why was she being so distant? Claire didn't know how to tell me and she's afraid I'll leave her.

"I'm going to be a father," I said quietly.

Steve smiled widely, "I'm going to be an uncle!"