You're Not My Type // Punk Luke Hemmings

Minnie - Chapter - Forty-Nine

Song in this chapter attached. Some words have been changed to fit the story.

Mia's POV.

"Mia, you're up."

I walked up to the front of the lecture room, my hands shaking as they held the lyrics I had written. The last time I did this, I was nervous because I was scared of people judging me. This time I was scared because the song was deep and I knew the person who it was wrote about would know.

I put all of my emotions and feelings towards Luke in this song and, secretly, I hope he realises how much I do love him, but also how much he has hurt me. It feels like there is something missing, a part of me that no longer exists. I know that the void in my heart is Luke, but I need to learn to live without him.

I cleared my throat as I got to the front of the room, trying to calm my nerves. I needed to get my breathing under control before I even attempt to get out the first line of the song. Terrified was an understatement for how I was feeling right now.

I walked over to the guitar in the corner and grabbed it, slinging it over my shoulder and positioning it. I've never been good at playing the guitar but over the last six months, Michael had been trying to teach me at every chance I get.

Taking a deep breath, I strung the first chord to the song before letting the words effortlessly fall from my mouth.

Feeling used,
But I'm still missing you.
And I can't see the end of this,
Just wanna feel your kiss, against my lips.

I glanced up from the guitar and let my eyes find the piercing blues one I had fallen in love with. Surprisingly, Luke looked genuinely upset. I know he loves me too, he's said it multiple times, and so it must hurt him to hear me singing about him like this.

And now all this time is passing by,
But I still can't seem to tell you why.
It hurts me everytime I see you,
Realize how much I need you.

I know I could probably live without him, but right now, it feel like I can't. As of right now, I need him. He makes me feel happy and safe and now that he won't even talk to me, it hurts me even more. I crave to be wrapped up in his arms, or having him leave sweet kissed against my lips. I love knowing that if anyone hurts me, he will be right next to me ready to punch them.

I hate you, I love you.
I hate that I love you.
Don't want to,
But I can't put nobody else above you.

I hate you, I love you.
I hate that I want you.
You want her, you need her,
And I'll never be her.

Seeing Luke and Carly together literally killed me. I thought that the biggest pain I would face, was Luke telling me he loves me but nothing will ever happen beyond what we had, when actually, the biggest pain was seeing Luke with someone else days after we confessed our love for each other. Seeing him happy and smiling and all I could feel was jealousy. I was jealous that I wasn't the reason behind his happiness.

I miss you when I can't sleep,
Or right after coffee
Or right when I can't eat.
I miss you in my front seat,
Still got drinks on my sweaters

From nights we don't remember.
Do you miss me like I miss you?
Fucked around and got attached to you.
Friends can break your hearts too, and
I'm always tired but never of you.

I miss him. I miss him so much it feels like I can't breathe properly sometimes. I miss his thumb gently rubbing against my hipbone as we lie in bed next to each other. I miss the sound of his voice calling me 'Minnie' or telling me how beautiful I am. I even miss how he would steal all of the covers at night so I was cold, just so I would cuddle closer to him. His laugh. His smile. I just miss him.