Dear E,
You told Allyson today that you don't hate me, and that I'm kinda pretty. I mean it's only kinda but it's definitly a start.
I miss you, but then I don't. I miss loving him. Or I guess liking him. I miss you so much right now. I wish you could be here next to me.
I'm tired. I wish you were here so I can lean my head on your shoulder or chest and sleep or at least rest against you. I know you probably wouldn't want me to, and even if you let me you would let me you probably wouldn't like it. Imagine if you lived next door to me. We could drive to band together, we could hang out all the time, we could talk all the time, we would be so close. I wish things were like that, but that's just not how the world works.
