Dear E,
Please don't move!! I mean I know it's not up to you but I don't want you to leave! I kinda hate you, but I kinda love you. I don't want you to leave!! Even if I ever said I wish you would leave and never come back. I miss you when were not even together, let alone 45 minutes apart all the time!
I don't know how I feel anymore. Today you stood in front of my locker and you looked down at me with an evil smile and beautiful eyes, I pushed you out of the way and you giggled. I don't know if I still feel the same about you. I have a feeling I don't though.
Recently I've missed him. Well, not him, but I miss loving him. Nobody has really talked about him lately, and nobody has let me talk about him but Mikey said that Joe says that I like him on the bus and I said no but hearing someone who really knows him talk about him made me really like him again.
I miss him so much. But he has a girlfriend and he doesn't like me. Do you think I should care about him? I mean, he's never tried to talk to me (as far as I definitly know), and he probably wouldn't disobey his parents and so we would never end up together, you know because he's two years older than me. I hate that I love him, but I miss loving him because I've loved him for so long. I think I just wanted to replace him with you, but I do care about you, and him. My heart is more confused than my head will ever be. My head knows I shouldn't like him because he's older than me and we won't ever go to the same school again, and I shouldn't like you because your mean and treat me like shit already. But my heart says that he lives sooo close that he can never forget me, so there is a chance, and that you and I would look perfect together so why shouldn't be together?
Either my heart is stupid, or my brain is mean.
