Kill Me

Almost

"We're going to take them down. If I'm mad at him, I won't feel the regret."

She sighs and decides to not go further.
"Good night L."
"Night Charles."


~The next day~

Dean and I prepared some guns and put some weapons in the safe room. These days were busy. I mean, you can't just take someone down in a few minutes. Days, weeks, of preparation fly by before you've a plan.
"Dean?" I ask while I put the last gun in the safe room.
"Yeah?"
"What are we gonna do after.. You know..?"
"We're going to try to live an as normal life as possible."
"Okay."
"Why do you ask?"
"Because we always talked about plans how we could take them down. I just can't believe that in a few weeks, it will be all over."
"In A few days."
"Yeah, that's what I meant."
"I think we're done for today. You go get some sleep."
"Okay, dad." I joke.
He looks a little.. I don't know, hurt?
I say nothing more and walk to my room. Why did he react that way?
I decide to let it fall and go to sleep.


~the next morning~

I leave the house with nerves. What if Calum sees me? Yesterday it worked to avoid him, but I don't think I will be so lucky today. I woke up too late, I messed up my clothes, I messed up breakfast, so this isn't my lucky day.


I walk to class as fast as possible until I realise something. I have this class with Calum. I immediately walk the other way but run into the teacher.
"Lana, class is that way." She points behind me.
"Yeah yeah..." I mumble not sure what to say.
"Don't mind ma'am, I'll take her." I feel two hands on my upper arms.
I look behind me and Calum stands behind me with a smirk.
Ugh, I gotta puke.
"Excellent." The teacher says while she walks away.


"So, we weren't going to skip class, right Lana?" He smirks.
"Shut the fuck up and go to class." I say while I push him back.
"I mean, you only may skip class with me." He goes on.
"Calum."
"If not, you'll need to go to class now." He finishes.
"But- lets go to somewhere private first."
He takes his knife out and puts it against my throat.
"Again?" I lift my eyebrow.


He ignores me and takes me into the janitors closet.
"Again?" I ask.
He pushes me against the wall and kisses me.
"Calum.. Stop." I mumble between the kisses while I try to push him off.
"No."
"Calum."
He stops kissing me and moves to my ear.
"Remember in the beginning? When we almost did it? I can tell that was played because the last time when Dean caught us? I could tell there was a difference in you. You can't tell me that the last time was played." He whispers.
"Calum." It's getting harder.
"Don't act as if you don't want to, because I know you want."
I grumble and grab his face. I was ready to punch him when he whispers.
"I want you to know one more thing; The last time wasn't played for me either."
I look at him for a long time and instead of punching him, I kiss him.
He immediately kisses back and moves his hands over my body.
"Tell me." He mumbles between the kisses.
"What?"
"Tell me that the last time wasn't played."
I look at him again.
"It wasn't." I say while I push him back on my lips.
He says no more and begins to unbutton his pants.
"Not in a janitors closet." I giggle while I push him back.
"I can't hold back anymore."
"You need to wait."
"I.. Fucking.... can't."
He pushes his member against me.
"That's what you do to me." He whispers while he leans in again.
"And I hate it." He adds.
"I know." I giggle softly in his neck.
"Lana.." He warns.
"Am I doing something wrong?" I ask innocently and laugh softly in his neck.
He grumbles before and his hands disappear under my shirt. They play with the clip of my bra while his mouth is busy with my neck.
"Calum, what if the janitor comes in?" I whisper followed by a moan.
"Then we have detention."
"And Dean will find out."
He stops and looks at me.
"I didn't say you need to stop." I whine.
"You did."
"But I don't want you to stop."
"Maybe it's better if we do. If Dean finds out, I'm dead."
"It's a risk you need to take." I'm still whining.
"Lana.."
"Calum." I moan in his neck.
"Don't." He tries to push me back but fails.
He grumbles again and unbuttons my pants. Suddenly, he stops with a playful smirk on his lip. His eyes darted like lazers in mine, something that I can't resist.
"I want you.." I bring out.
"Lana, if the janitor really comes in..."
"Then I'll make sure that Dean doesn't kill you." I finish.
"You would?"
I nod my head and whine. He needs to go on.
He stops and looks at me.
"So you do feel something for me?"
I look at him now too.
"I-.. I-.. Maybe." I sigh.
"It's a yes or a no."

...

"Yes." I breathe and that's all he needs to go on.
He wants to unclip my bra, but I stop him.
"Don't. If the janitor really comes in, then maybe we can make it out before he can take us to the office."
He nods and works his hands to my underwear. He plays with the threads of the lace before pulling it off quickly.
"This is crazy." I whisper.
"We're crazy." He corrects.
He drops his underwear too and doesn't waste any time. He pushes his full length info me and I muffle my moan in his shoulder. He waits before moving slowly.
"Calum, if you wanna make me cum before tomorrow than you should be a little quicker." I whisper sarcastic.
He smirks and goes even slower.
"Calum..." I whine.
Finally, after what seemed like an entirety, he moves faster.
I try as much to muffle my moans in Calum's shoulder.
He groans softly in my neck.
"Faster." I breathe while I dig my fingers in his back.
He doesn't tease me this time and moves faster.
I almost sigh in relief and hear that my moans get louder. I try to hold them in, but Calum...
I moan his name as softly as I can while I feel that he gets closer. Suddenly my muscles tighten and muffle my moan in his neck. Then he moves faster and deeper until he groans. When I realise how loud he is, I kiss him to mute the sound.
He pulls himself out and looks at me while he catches his breath.


Then I realise what I just did.
"This never should've happen." I say while I put my clothes back on.
"Don't say that." He lays his hands on my cheeks.
"We can make this work and-"
"Can't you see Calum?! This is never going to work. If Dean even finds out that you kissed me.. You'll be dead before you can say my name."
"Lana.."
"No, don't. This was wrong. I don't want you to get into trouble."
I suppose to walk away but he holds his arms against the wall.
" Just so You know, the girl was just to distract Dean."
I don't say anything but walk out.


I skip the rest until break. After that I walk to my table. Charlie, Emily and Dylan are already there.
"Where were you?" Charlie asks.
"What do you mean?" I sit down.
"You weren't in class the second period."
"I didn't feel well."
"The teacher didn't know anything."
"Because I didn't told her."
I look over to Calum and see that he's staring at me. He waves me over. I shake my head a little and return my attention to my food.
"Lana, if you broke rules again.." Charlie says.
"You broke them too. Don't act so innocent."
"What do you mean?"
"You left me alone with Calum the other day. That's against the rules."
"No, I mean school rules."
"Than I'm totally clean." Almost.
I look over to Calum again and he waves at me again.
I sigh and drop my fork.
"Be right back." I say while I stand up and walk to Calum.

"What do you want?" I ask while I stand in front of him.
"You." He whispers in my ear.
"Eyh, Cutie is back." Ashton says while he wraps an arm around me neck.
I smile at him.
"I missed you cutie." He says while he plants a kiss on my forehead.
"And I'm not the only one.." He giggles.
I look at Calum, but he's glaring at Ashton. He looks like he's a few seconds away from punching Ashton, so I quickly drop Ashton's arm.
"Anything you wanna tell me or not?" I cross my arms.
He leans to my ear.
"No, I just wanted to see you." He whispers.
"You can do that too when I'm sitting at my table." I say while I turn around.
I walk away, back to my table. Halfway I stop.
"Stop staring at my ass!"
A burst of laughs by Ashton and Michael fills the space. I look briefly over my shoulder and see that Calum slaps Ashton against the back of his head.

I walk back to my table.
"What the hell was that?" Dylan asks.
"Nothing."
"Oh, so it's normal to talk to a rival gang."
"They're not as bad as you think."
"Lana, I don't care if it were fucking Angels, we're going to kill them. You shouldn't be making friends."
I shrug and turn back to my food.
"Lana, if Dean knows that this is happening-..."
"I don't care what he fucking knows! I went to them because I wanted to! And just so you know, I rather be in their gang than in his." I spat the last sentence in his ear.
I stand up and walk away. Dylan looks too shocked to do anything and all eyes are on my when I walk out.

I lean against the wall and let myself shove to the ground. I'm not crying or anything, just not happy.
"So, you want to be in my gang?" I hear next to me.
I look up and see Calum standing against the lockers.
"No, I said I rather be in yours than in Dean's."
"So you did say it."
"What?"
"Oh, Michael overheard something but I thought it wasn't true. Now I know it is."
I smile and he sits down too.
"Lana, if you want to be in our gang, why didn't you say so?"
"It wasn't like that until I got the assignment. But then I saw how relaxed it was with you. With Dean it's always about getting orders."
"But-."
"No, don't say it. I don't wanna. No, I can't. Not now.." I sigh.
"Lana-"
"No, I said that I can't, so I won't."
"Lana, look, I like you, a lot. I know I said it before, but I mean it this time. I really like you, it's not just some stupid crush on you. I'm only saying that if you were in my gang, I would never-"
"Please, don't. Don't try to change my mind."
"I'm not-"
"You are. I'm sorry Calum, I can't."

I stand up and walk away. I run back to my house and see that Dean is still preparing some guns. I almost begin to cry, but Dean comes already walking to me.
"Lana, what happened? Is everyone okay?" He asks while he checks me.
"Everyone's fine." Except me.
"Than why are you not in school?"
"I couldn't. Calum was there and Dylan and Charlie were not working with me and-"
"Lana, stop." He sighs.
"Look, I know it will be hard to kill them, but it's something we gotta do. If we don't do it now, they'll do it later to us. Do you really want to be Calum with a gun in his hands the last thing that you see before he shoots you and you die?"
"No, he would never-"
"He would. Maybe not because he hates you, but even if he didn't hate you, he would out of loyalty for his gang."
But you don't know about everything.
"Lana, I'm saying that you need to be prepared. I don't like that you're falling apart like this. You know what, we'll attack them tomorrow."....