Who Am I Now?

Chapter 25

Ch 25 

"Aleck!" 

"what" 

"I'm thirsty" 

"coming" 

today is day 4 of bed rest and its killing me. I'm stuck in this bed for ten more days. I get to spend the first 2 weeks of being 18 in bed, but my body's not mine anymore its the twins's It sucks though because I can feel myself getting fatter from the lack of activity. Aleck will not let me move unless I'm going to the bathroom. He wont even let me shower he insists that I take baths so that I'm not on my feet for long. I feel so smothered and babied I know he only wants whats best for me but it still sucks. 

"hey jenny how you feeling?" He says handing me some water. 

"Aleck I'm fine" I say sighing 

He sits down next to me and starts playing with my hair.  

"babe I know this sucks but its worth it right?" 

"ya im just tired of doing nothing all day" 

He brushes my hair out of my face and kisses my forehead 

"You are so beautiful" 

"Far from it" 

"Jennifer Gracelynn you are beautiful" 

I look away and blush how could i be so luck to find a guy to find me beautiful in my pregnant state 

"I'm tired" I say as I role onto my side 

"jenny why cant you see how amazing you are?" 

I sigh "i don't know" 

"well you are the most amazing and gorgeous woman and these babies" he says putting his hand on my stomach "are lucky they get to be part of you for nine months then they get you as an amazing mother" 

"Aleck you can always make me smile" i kiss his nose then yawn  

He lightly pushes me down so I'm laying then cuddles up next to me 

"ok go to sleep now baby you need your sleep" 

I don't sleep I just lay there and think I'm so confused I like Aleck but I can't stop thinking about the memories with josh. I cant help but think about the way he used to kiss me....he hasn't talked to me since he left the hospital. 

I don't know what got into him but I'm confused he said he would never leave then he leaves without saying goodbye even. It hurts so bad. I have my eyes closed and Aleck thinks I'm asleep and he starts playing with my hair 

"god I love you so much" 

wait did he just say he loves me? 

"it kills me to think you don't see your beauty." 

wow how could he think of me so amazingly. I'm not amazing. I'm over 23 weeks pregnant and fat. He acts like I'm so amazing. What if one day I fall off of the pedestal. What if i have the twins and he cant take it. What if i lose him like i did josh. Wait josh? what in the world why do i keep thinking about josh? Do i still care about him? No only as a friend. Whats wrong with me? Ugh this is horrible I'm horrible I'm in the arms of the most amazing guy and I'm thinking about josh! God I'm stupid! Ugh I'm tired i really do need to sleep. I snuggle closer to Aleck god he smells so good i take a deep breath and finally give in to sleep....................................

*Dream 

"Jenny you look amazing" Sam says walking up behind me 

I'm looking at the mirror I'm in a form fitting long white strapless dress and it looks breath taking. My hair is pinned up with a few perfect curls falling down around my face 

My mom walks up behind me and i suck in a sharp breath "jenny i cant believe you are getting married" 

I smile at her and turn around to hug her. 

She kisses my cheek"He is one lucky man" 

"I know mom. I'm so happy you are here" 

"I wouldn't miss it for the world baby" 

Just then my dad knocks "everybody decent" 

My mom giggles "yes Kevin now come look at our beautiful daughter" 

He walks in and smiles "shes breath taking, my little girl really has grown up" 

I look down and blush "stop daddy" 

"Well are you ready" he says holding out his arm 

I smile and take it "hell ya" i start walking out the door

"Jenny Jenny.........Jenny baby wake up I have dinner made for you" 

I groan not wanting to wake up I was having the perfect dream it was the first time iv dreamed of my mom since.......the day without it turning into a nightmare and it felt good. 

"come on Jenny I'm sure you're hungry and so are the twins. 

I sigh hes not gonna leave me alone. I sit up in bed and push my hair out of my face. 

"ok so what did you make me?" 

"broccoli cheese soup" 

"yummy" 

"i know right I'm amazing" 

I laugh "pft ok" 

"I'm not?" he says faking hurt 

"awe yes baby you're amazing" I say patting his cheek and giggleing 

"good" 

"can I have my food now oh oops ya" he says handing me the tray of food. 

I start eating right away because I'm starving. After a minute he leaves the room. I miss him being near me. 

"ALECK" 

He comes in the room looking annoyed "what now" he says a little angrily. 

I look down at my hands "sorry I just missed you" 

"oh baby i should be sorry I snapped I'm just tired is all I shouldn't have snapped" 

I look up at him and smile "then come lay by me." 

I set the tray over on the side and pat the bed beside me. Before long hes in a deep sleep and I start stroking his hair. I wonder who i was marrying in my dream. 

"no I love her you cant" 

I stop "Aleck baby whats wrong" 

He doesn't respond. He was taking in his sleep. Who does he love and who cant do what?