Who Am I Now?

Chapter 31

Ch 31

it has been a week since chase called me. It feels like its been so much longer though. Monday when we came back from the beach house Aleck was waiting on my door step. When i got out of the car he ran, picked me up and said he was sorry. It went about like this. 

"Jenny I missed you so much!" -picks me up- "I'm so sorry please forgive me" 

"ok just please put me down" 

Then we went in my house and talked it out. He told me how sorry he was and me being me forgave him. It was Anthony's birthday so we had cake and ice cream. He didn't want a party, such a strong little kid. I think its because now he is old enough to realize his birthday is only a week before our mom died. The next day Aleck went with me to the doctor and we saw the twins. They are growing so fast now its amazing to see their little hands and feet. The rest of the week me and Aleck just hung out and got back to normal. I didn't tell him about josh kissing me. It will only cause trouble between the two of them. I still can't get it out of my mind about what he said about the twins. I can't help but think some part of him really feels that way. Today is the 2nd of august which means its the anniversary of when my mom died. I can't believe its been five years. Poor Anthony was only a year old when our mom killed herself. tomorrow I'm taking him to the zoo and a few other fun places to get his mind off of our moms death. God I love that kid.

Today Shelly wants to talk to me. So that's what I'm about to go down stairs and do. I have no clue what she wants to talk about. She was all mysterious it kinda scares me. Sigh might as well go see what she wants. I go find Shelly and she leads me to the living room.

"jenny we need to figure out your future, summer is almost over and you need to decide what to do. Many of the collages that exepted you with scholarship won't give you a scholarship if you take time off."

"i know I just don't know what I want to do"

"before the twins what did you see yourself doing"

"i don't know I just want to be happy and give the twins a good life"

"well what about teaching, you're so good with Ben and Anthony"

"no I dont want to be in school the rest of my life"

"umm well you enjoy helping others I know that much"

"ya u do....would it be weird if I said I wanted to be an abuse counselor" 

"no it makes sence with everything that has happened in your life" 

"i don't know I was thinking maybe going to the community collage for two years then see where life takes me"

"sounds like a plan I'm happy we have this figured out"

After my talk with Shelly I get a text from Aleck.

"hey im taking you out tonight dress nicely ;)"

"what time lol"

"6"

"kk"

Its only 3 so I decide to grab a snack and go up stairs to read a book when I finally look back up at the clock its 4:30 Holy crap time flew. I go jump in the shower and after 35 min I'm finally finished. I walk to my closet and pick out a simple black knee length.dress. I blow dry my hair curled put on a little make-up and throw my favorite flats on. As I'm touching up my lip gloss I hear a knock on my bedroom door.  

"hey there sexy lady"

I turn around and smile "hey"

He walks up and kisses me. "ready?"

"yep"

When we pull up to the place I smile its an Italian restaurant. He comes around and opens my door. As we walk in an older couple smiles at us. "oh what a lovely family" 

"grechen she has no ring" 

"i didn't wear mine when I was pregnant" 

"hmp" 

I giggle and whisper to josh "they are the cutest couple"

What I didn't tell him was that I almost wish what they said was true. Im still a little scared of what I feel for Aleck but I'm learning to except it. He really is good to me and makes me happy. i can really start to picture a future with him now

We make it back to our table and our waitress comes.  

"hello I'm Stacia can I get you drinks?" 

"ill have tea and she will have a water" 

"ok ill be right back with that" 

She walks away and Aleck takes my hand  

"jenny you really do look beautiful tonight I can't believe you are my girl" 

"Aleck youre making me blush" 

"and its really cute" 

the waitress comes with our drinks then takes our order. 

When the waitress leaves again he kisses my hand. "you are amazing"

All threw dinner he keeps complementing me and its so sweet. After dinner we drive to the beach we are sitting in the sand when he turns to me. 

"jenny I don't want to scare you off but I have to tell you....you are the most amazing person, you don't let your past make you a bitter person....i love you so much Jenny its crazy" 

I stair at him in awe 

"jenny?" 

"Aleck....i-i love you too but I'm scared." 

"of what?"

"everything"

"jenny I wont hurt you I promise" 

"good" 

He pulls me to him and kisses me. I feel a tingling that I always blocked out but this time I don't. I want him closer and that's all I can think about. I run my tongue along his lips asking for entrance, more like begging. He happily lets me. we lay down so I'm on top of him. I moan in the back of my throat as I push myself closer to him. He breaks away and kisses down my neck. It drives me crazy and I moan. I pull his lips back to mine as his hands graze the bottom of my shirt. 

"Aleck I want you so bad right now" 

he gently pushes me off of him "i can't jenny it just doesn't feel right to do while you're pregnant" 

"i understand" 

I cuddle closer to him and we just stair at the stars. i could live with this.