I am you and You are me? (South Park Body swap AU)

Cartman

(A/n: Ms. Rain here with the fourth chapter featuring Cartman in Butters' body, and all I have to say is poor Butters. Please enjoy)  

"Ooooh mooooom, where the hell's my breakfast?!" The southern accented voice singed, but it wasn't in an impatient manner. More like in a teasing way.

"C-coming sweet-"

"Nooo, that's not how you address me."

"I'm sorry, I mean M-master Leo. Your food will be served to you shortly."

Cartman smirked proudly as he sat back on the couch, this was way too easy. Though he wished he were in somebody else's body, someone who was more intimidating and can strike fear into a person with one glance. But on the contrary, seeing the always happy-go-lucky and nice Butters being demanding all of a sudden can be good change.

People witnessing the unexpected was always satisfying to Cartman.

When said teen woke up in this wimp's body, he was more pissed off than freaked out- hoping that this was a dream or a nightmare. Although the latter didn't matter. He went to Butters' bathroom, not caring about the room's details, just know it hadn't changed at all. Hello Kitty and other girly shit was everywhere.

He entered the bathroom, thankful it was your average bathroom with a few girly items here and there though, he looked into the mirror with a scowl. "The hell have I done to deserve this? Well at least I'm not in the stinkin' Jew's body, though I would've made his already shity life even shittier."

He snickered at that thought, the Jew was so lucky. The mischievous teen in Butters' body left out of the bathroom after using the toilet then went down the hall. He spotted both Butters' parents in the kitchen, his mother Linda was cooking breakfast while his father Stephen was sat at the dining room table with a newspaper in hand. Cartman walked over to the couch and turned on the t.v.

"Leopold what do you think you're doing? Turn the t.v off right now and come sit at the table or you're-"

"Grounded, yeah yeah, whatever," Cartman interjected dully as he surfed for a channel to watch. That was pretty much all they ever do to Butters, constantly ground him. That is just sad.

Stephen suddenly appeared beside him,  grabbing the remote from out of his hand with a glare that didn't faze him in the least. "Don't you dare use that tone with your mother. Now apologize and head to the table young man." Even the man's threatening order didn't even get a reaction out of him, time to kick this dude down a notch.

"Oh? Or what? You gonna ground me for a week?" He challenged. "Pfft like that hasn't happened already." He just realized that he said all of this in Butters' accent and he laughed, further making Stephen mad.

Linda set a plate of pancakes down on the table then walked over to them, giving her son a stern scowl. "Leopold you listen here, I don't know what's gotten into you all of a sudden but you better change your behavior right this instant." Yawn, it's like these two try way too hard to be strict parents, their only method was to ground the poor boy.

Well not today. As long as Cartman was in his body, though he hoped not for long, he wasn't going to take any shit from these two.

"Oh dear mother I'm sorry," he said in a fake caring tone. "Let me apologize for my rudeness." On the inside he was laughing evilly at the "apology" he was going to give her. He gave her a well-produced smile then leaned over to her ear, whispering something to her for a good fifteen seconds before pulling back with an innocent smile on his face.

Stephen looked at the two in confusion, just what did Butters say to her? "I-I accept y-your a-apology son. I-I'm going to finish up on breakfast." She walked away with a red face, Stephen wasn't sure if her stuttering was from fear or embarrassment. Just what the hell happened? 

"Leo what did you really tell your mother? And do not lie." Cartman turned to him with his innocent smile gone, instead an impish grin was on his face. Such a look greatly caught him off guard, who knew Butters could pull off an expression like that.

Cartman almost laughed at the man's shocked face, this was getting fun now. He was so going to enjoy this. "If you want, I can tell you as well although I think you might already know. Do you remember what you did last Thursday at his house?" He was practically in the man's face at this point.

Stephen's face paled and he gritted his teeth. This was not Butters. This was not their son.

"Y-you little, just who are you?! I know now that you aren't our son so just-"

He was cut off by Cartman's obnoxious laughter. Linda stiffened at the sudden sound at the stove. The somewhat crazed teen ceased his laughing as he pretended to wipe a tear from his eye, he was enjoying this way too much.

"I don't know what you're talking about dad, I am your son. Let's just say I'm sick an' tired of always being constantly grounded for the littlest shit I do, like for example me coming in here and turning on the t.v." He gave the man the best glare he could muster, making sure his sky blue eyes paralyzed the man before him. Mobilizing fear into a person is key when trying to get your way, he can thank all of the scary and action movies for this concept.

"From now on I'm gonna be the ruler of this house, got it? If you even think about opposing me, well let's just say you're gonna get fed to the dogs in a mass of both you and my sweet mother's organs. Now I believe you have to go to work don't you pops?"

Stephen was frozen stiff at Butters' cold tone, was his sudden crazed demeanor really the cause of them always grounding him? They only did it for his sake, they wanted him to be well disciplined thus was the reason they started the strict punishment. They never thought their actions would lead their son into threatening them...

The brown haired male swallowed his pride as he bowed his head, hopefully apologizing would make it up to him. As pathetic as it sounds. "L-listen Leo I-we are truly sorry for our overbearing behavior, we just thought-"

"Aww save it, I don't wanna hear your sorry ass excuses. You can make it up to me buying me four bags of Cheesy Poofs and two liters of soda when you get back from work, then I'll accept your apology." Cartman sat back down on the couch and extended his hand out toward Stephen for the remote, the male handing it to the blonde not a split second later. Stephen then announced that he was leaving for work, abandoning his poor wife in the hands of their 'son'.

"Oh my fucking God, this was waaay too easy. This was all Butters had to do, but he's too much of a pussy to even think about talking back these tight asses. Oh well his lost," he thought arrogantly. He didn't mind staying in Butters' body now that he had made said blonde's parents his minions.

"Oooooh mooom, where the hell's my breakfast?!"

***

Down in Hell we find a black haired being clad in all black sat on a King sized bed in what appeared to be his room. The dark haired male had his head buried in his hands, his shoulders slightly shaking although no sound was coming from him.

It was seconds later that the male sat up with a smile plastered on his handsome face. He released a content sigh as he opened his eyes revealing blood red orbs with cat-like pupils, the smile still present on his face.

He looked at the big screen in front of him, on it was a smirking blonde sitting on a couch. A moment later the blonde's mother brought him a plate full of pancakes and bacon. Not one person alone could finish it, but if you're Eric Cartman you most likely could.

The Antichrist's smile widened then he changed the channel to said fat teen's body, the person in his body seemed to be enjoying Cartman's life. The fat teen always had it easy to begin with.

"This is getting more interesting like I hoped it would."

South Park never ceased to amaze him.

(A/n: Wow kinda got dark towards the middle there, well it is Cartman and also I wanted to wait until I did all of the switched teens before I introduced Damien but oh well. I hope you enjoyed and the next chapter will be up tomorrow evening)