Soldier

thirty-three

[Ahmed Shiekh's P.O.V.]

The T.V screen was filled with the black smoke just as a kettle overflow with steam and burst up and the steam spills all around in the surrounding.

Lots of screams, chaos and tension's all around.

Suddenly all got vanished. And men with their faces covered with a black cloth piece appeared taking the responsibility of the terrorist attacks that held fifteen years ago in APS School, Peshawar.

I stood up from my chair with my mouth widely open in a shock. As I were the Chief Operating officer back than to find out who are the responsible for this massacre that devoured my one and only son. And for which I went to Afghanistan occasionally as I doubted the Afghan Troop but I never found any such material.

My mind was filled with a pile of questions.

The room I was standing in seemed to revolve all around me, the pictures of Suffiyan were the only sight I could have, all I could listen were the last words spoken by him to me;

"I am scared baba, please come, please do it fast!"

I pulled my hair to stop those violent voices screaming in my head, my eyes were filled with tears that stood inside the lid and was blurring the image.

I put my hands on my knees and got bend forward as I were decipher to understand what's causing me all this?

Was this that pain of remembrance of my loss? Was this the pain I've been going through from the last fifteen years ago that caused me a heavy amount, created the distances between me and Ameena? Was this.. 'This' the answer to Ameena's blank eyes? Was this all I got after the struggle of all those terrible years?

No, no , no I couldn't tell this to Ameena.

I wanted to scream out loudly but even I couldn't do that.

I finally sat down on the floor like a lost and tired circus lion. And in no sense I played the CD again and again but when I found nothing more I took it out and put it back in that box and started wiping off my tears that were still there in my lids.

A few moments later I listened to the door knob that pushed the door forward which caused the door creaked out loudly.

"Ahmed?"

Listening to Ameena I silently gulped the pang that was running through my veins that moment, lifted my head up closing my eyes so tight that all those marks of torment that were there a moment later vanished quickly, clutched my fingers to the palms and locked them tightly with my thumbs and that heavy breath was controlled by that clench of jaws that locked my teeth behind.

"Are you alright?" She made her sight way to me.

"It dropped on the floor." Lifting the pen up I forced a smile. It might were my startling eyes that made Ameena took time to answer back.

I got up and turned away to the book shelf, backing Ameena's face.

"Okay, okay." And she had just an 'okay' to say to me?

Couldn't she find out the pain in me anymore?

I didn't knew what held up to my head I turned at her pulled her from her arm and it was then when those still tears strolled out of eyes.

Her eyes were still even then.

"What have I done, huh? Tell me today, can't you see it in my eyes that I too have the same pain you're going through with? but I give you all you need and you, you don't even have a few kind words for me? A little help out that can make me stable, make me feel I am not alone?" My eyes were hooked in hers.