An Outsider Love Story

heart break

I hear some rustling noises coming from out my window. I didn’t move. I knew it was Johnny coming up to sleep. I make some circles into the letters and shade it in the background. I look up and see Soda.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” I get up off my bed and put my arms around his neck.

“Hey there beautiful.” He whispers in my ear as he puts his hands on my waist.

“whats up?” I tilted my head.

“We need to talk.” He looks at me taking his hands off me and reaches up taking my hands off him.

“I need you to sit down.” He shows no emotion.

"Why?" I look at him concerned.

"I'll tell you if you sit down." His cheeks puff out.

“No, tell me whats going on. You are scaring me.” I cross my arms.

"We need to take a break. I can't be with you anymore."

"What? Why?" My eyes tear up.

"I just need a break from you. I can't get you out of my head. I need a clear mind to think.  I can't sleep, work or do the Rumble with you in my head. You're slowing me down." He looks at the ground.

"What are you talking about?" The tears flow down my face.

"You can take care of yourself. You're strong girl. You're a Shepard. You don't need me."

"Soda look at me." I grit my teeth as he stares at me with pity. I don't want pity.

"Say it to my face that you don't love me. Tell me that you don't need me anymore." He steps forward inches away from me.

"I don't love you. I don't need you. I never did." My heart drops as I look him in the eyes. My hand connects with his face. Seconds later a red mark appears on his face. But he doesn't flinch.

"I love you. From the minute I saw you. From your weakest moments to the strongest. I stood by your side. What changed Soda? Huh? What changed?!" I yell.

"I did! I grew up not wanting to babysit my own girlfriend who can't even take care of herself. She has to rely on someone to save her." He shouted at me.

"I changed." He lowered his voice.

"Get out." I look at the ground. He stands there still.

"I said, get out!" I yell, pushing him toward the window.  He sits in the window ceil looking at me as I cry softly. He whispers 'sorry' then jumps out of the window.

The light flickers on down the hall way. It sounds like Tim is coming by the sound of his footsteps. Tim pokes his head in then he comes in all the way.

“I heard you yelling. Whats going on?” Tim looked at me and yawns.

“Nothing Tim. Get some sleep. I'm fine.” I wipe the tears off my face.

“You sure?" He looks at me closely.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He then gets that I don't want to talk about it right now.

"You should close your window. It’s going to get cold and please go to sleep it’s already eleven o’clock.”

“Ok." I walk over to my window and shut it. Then I walk over to my bed and climb in and get under the blankets.

“Good night Lola.” Tim yawns.

“Night Tim.” He turns the lights off and closes the door. I cried myself to sleep. What the hell did I do to deserve this?