zero: a goodbye

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If you see asterisks, it means there is a picture of the character's outfit at the end.


SUZY

Normal day. It's just a typical day. I can get through this without him.

"I don't think you can get through this day." An unmotivated, bitter person uttered beside me.

"Thank you for cheering me up. It helped me, truly." I rolled my eyes at Jennie.

"Well, if you want me to support whatever theme you're wearing today, I will politely pass the offer." She looks at me from head to toe.

I didn't have the motivation to get dolled up today, but my outfit isn't that bad. I was wearing a navy blue sweater paired with skinny black jeans and white shoes. * It isn't too bad, isn't it?

"You're so mean." I pouted.

We both stopped in front of our lockers. Jennie leaned on her locker while I put the numbers to open mine.

The locker door swung open, and I rummage through the books inside. At the bottom corner, I noticed a handkerchief. I picked it up, and it hit me.

It's his handkerchief. He must have forgotten it.

Jennie grabbed the hanky from my hand.

"Whose handkerchief is this?"

"It's his." When I tried to grab it from her, she backed up, hitting my hand away.

"Ow! What was that for?" I rubbed my hand. It stung. Her hands are heavy.

"Before I decide whether to throw it in the bin behind you or give it back, what are your plans about this piece of fabric from your ex?" She swings the hanky back and forth in an attempt to tease me.

I wasn't planning on acting on it. It was his fault that he forgot his hanky in my locker. I will not give it back to him. He should be mindful of his belongings.

But, this hanky was gifted to him by his mother. The morally right thing to do is to return it to him, correct?

"I—"

"Wrong answer. You have thought about it, meaning you have plans of returning it to him. I guess I'll chuck it in the bin." She threatened while swaying the handkerchief above the bin.

"It's from his mom. How would you feel if I tossed your ring in the trash?" She gasped and put her hand on her chest, caressing the ring on her finger.

"Fine! But I will return it. I will not let you talk to him again, considering what you've done last time."

"What? What did I do?"

"You begged him not to leave you. That's what you did, and there is no way in hell that I am letting you do that to yourself again."

--

Classes are done. My college life is over.

Today's officially our last day as seniors. There's nothing special. I wanted to leave this hell on earth anyway. This campus holds too many memories. Every time I step foot, my heart honestly feels so heavy, so much that I couldn't even bear to move.

Exaggeration? No. It's called hurting.

Four years. In those four years, he was with me. I entered this campus with him, and now I'm leaving without him.

It will be fine, right?

"Suzy..." I froze.

That voice.

His voice.

I slowly turned around to face him.

I could only utter one word.

"Baekhyun." I stared at his face. His sweet face. Only now, his face was nowhere near sweet. His eyes are dark like he has been crying. He looks distraught. His hair and clothes are also messy.

He breathes heavily. He looks up for a while and looks down at me again. But this time, his eyes are watery.

I bit my lip. I am fighting the urge to cry. I don't want to cry just yet.

Baekhyun pulls me aside from the entrance, where fewer people are.

He doesn't let go of my hand. Instead, he held both of my hands and slowly caressed the inside of my palms using his thumb.

He chuckled.

"Baekhyun, I'm confused. What is this?" He focuses on me.

"I couldn't..." His tears fell. My heart was pounding. I tightened my grip on his hands.

"What is it?" I know in my heart that I am not ready for whatever he is about to tell me.

He sniffled. "I couldn't bear to tell you, and I was weak. I didn't fight for you. I left you, and that hurt me so much knowing how,"

He stops to gather his breath. He was already crying so much.

"Knowing how every time I saw you, your eyes weren't the same anymore." I let go of my other hand and wiped his tears.

"But I couldn't," Baekhyun shifts his gaze to me.

"You couldn't what?"

"I couldn't leave without saying goodbye." At that moment, I felt as though my heart has stopped beating. I was numb.

"Goodbye? Where are you going?" My eyes started to water.

He sighed loudly. He looks at me and caresses my face. He looked at me in the eyes and pulled me in for a kiss.

This all feels like a nightmare.

Baekhyun pulls away, forcing a smile. "I want you to know that I love you. I do."

"I love you, too."

He looks at me as if he is sure that it will be the last time he gazes upon me.

"I love you,"

He let go of my hand and started walking away.

"Baekhyun, wait!" He suddenly disappeared from my vision. My eyes are clouded with tears, and my vision was getting blurry.

I blinked. I couldn't see him anymore. He has already blended within the crowd of students getting inside the campus.

"Suzy?" I faced the person who called out my name.

His eyes widened. He grabs my hand and pulls me in for a hug.

"What happened?" Kyungsoo stroke my back gently.

Three words.

"I don't know."

Goodbye, indeed.

----

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