What Baking Can Do

Prologue

I think we all have a time in our life where we start to find out who we truly are. In my life, these instances seemed to appear a few at a time and the older I became, obviously, the longer the story was when I took a moment to look back on how I got to where I am today.

Life can be confusing and I don't believe there's one correct way to advise someone on how to live it. But I do think this era if you will, when one of my artistic works was being released into the world, was when I found myself realizing so much more than my love of musicals. 

My career before this era was given life through my music, most of which was based on previous relationships. 

Men. Of course. 

Now, am I aware that fans and some people think I'm lesbian?

Hell yeah. I mean, it's based off a lot of stereotypes.. which also, from what I've noticed, seem to be true for many queer ladies. But whatever people think what they think.

I've had boyfriends and that is all I've really known. That's all I let the public know about as well. 

Sure, I've talked about the little project a friend Jen and I wrote while on tour

*clears throat*

LESBIANS!

Haha, yeah. That happened. Good times. More on that one later. 

Until a recent interview where I mentioned, I had a crush on a girl leading to the unfortunate fact that she was not single. I thought about that a lot while I was on my way home from the interview. Some of the best self-to-self think sessions happen in the back of a cab, or an uber if you're feeling fancy. I wasn't even going to approach trying to label myself. 

This recent time was different was different from what I explained on the radio. Well maybe not, this girl wasn't single either. What was different is the depth of feelings I experienced. I began to think about love on a much larger scale. Then started asking myself "could I really end up with a girl?".  I re-evaluated a number of my relationships with female friends who I always viewed as platonic. Ones who I can end up on the couch with after an exhausting day while we watch tv and share the details of our day - or ya know, make silly karaoke videos after having a few drinks. 

The way I felt about those friends was far different from the way she made me feel.  Different from the way a guy has made me feel. Was this just because of her or was this something more? The butterflies in my stomach, choking on words, mind going blank because I was too busy admiring her beauty.  

Haha, yeah. I'm screwed.