What Baking Can Do

But Then You Found Me

I continued to spend time away from my Waitress family in the next few days. Things with the show continued to develop and excitement was growing. The day they set the marquee up I knew I had to make my way to the theater that night to bask in its glory, a memory that was just the beginning of the mess I was making. As my friends and I turned the corner all the happy feelings that were building inside turned me into a little jumpy child. I have no regrets. I was even telling random strangers that this was my show! They probably thought I was some crazy lady on the streets but like I said, no regrets! It's all starting to feel more real.

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It's a new month and a new beginning for our little baby of a project. The cast and crew met at our rehearsal space for our first read-through. Everyone was looking forward to these weeks leading up to our move into the Brooks. There was a lot of work ahead of us, choreography to learn and chemistry to cook (bake) up.

After final plans for the week were set I walked out to the hall to check my phone. Jessie came around the corner and froze when she saw me. I tried to smile, but my stomach dropped.

God, she was beautiful. And god, I was screwed.

"Hey," I said, trying to keep my tone of voice in check. I took a few steps towards her, trying to act normal despite what had happened while I was "taking notes" with Diane.

"Hi," she replied, eyeing me with an expression I couldn't read. This worried me.

Jessie opened her mouth as if to say something, sucked in a breath, closed it, then opened her mouth again.

"What is this?" Out of her apron pocket, she pulled a half-sheet of paper.

"There's an entire conversation about..."

I immediately started screaming in my head. Shit. I looked down and stammered. Nothing left to do but tell the truth. "Um, I, uh, I just..."

Jessie tilted her head at me. Her voice didn't really hold anger... more like curiosity. "Is this true?" she asked. "You were seriously writing all this to Diane? I thought you were taking notes...?"

"Where did you get that?" I asked out of pure impulse and fear. I instantly regretted the question, but I still needed to know.

"I was cleaning up a few things and it was on the floor by the seats you guys were sitting in. It was totally unfolded."

Fuck.

I thought I'd picked it up.

I remembered the entire conversation Diane and I had. I couldn't focus on doing actual work. My feelings were too strong. You see, during early rehearsals Diane and I had a little system of writing notes to each other during read-throughs, similar to a live edit in Google Docs but on paper. This became a thing among a few of us that provided a way of communication when we didn't want to stop the actors and disrupt a scene, they needed this time to connect and learn each other's deliveries. We left our laptops for the more technical things. I thought back to the conversation, 

I have something I need to talk about, I'd written to Diane.

What is it?

Swear not to tell anyone? Ever.

I won't.

It's about JM.

What about her?

I like her

LOL, who doesn't

No. I like her.