Unchained Heart

Chapter 8

After everyone in the room had a good cry Morris came up to me with his hand out. His face looked sad as he looked at me. I wiped my face as Prince and Andre helped me up from the floor.

"You're really just gonna give up?" Morris asked in a defeated voice.

My words had done so much damage a few moments ago that I didn't realize that my rant had really hit hi the most. I smiled a little and took his hand.

"No Morris. I'm not giving up. I was just......its been a lot going on and I'm not too sure if I really want to face this thing alone."

"But you're not alone. You have us. You always have."

Morris was never the one I'd expect to take comforting advice from but he was sure dishing it out today. It made my heart full of happiness to see this side of him that nobody has ever seen before.

"I know that now Morris. Thank you." I sad to him running my right hand down his face.

Cat and Rene came up from behind Morris and stood side by side.

"Well we don't want you to give up either." Rene said.

"Yeah without you this whole group would probably be a mess!" Cat piped up with a big grin as she looked over at Jerome.

"Whatcha looking at me for?" He said stunned.

"We all know that it was Regan who brought us all together is some way boy! You've been trying to take credit of that for years!" Cat snapped.

"If it wasn't for me then Regan would have never known about any of y'all!" Jerome retorted.

"Tricky?" I called.

"Yeeesss?"

"Shut the hell up!"

He laughed and shook his head.

"You lucky Regan is standing right there!" Jerome shot at Cat.

As I shook my head at these two still going back and forth about their nonsense Andre came up to me and placed a hand on my shoulder. I turned to find my good friend still teary eyed but at least this time he had a smile on his face.

"Hey you!" He chuckled softly.

"Cymone. How are ya?"

"Listen. I'm- I'm sorry for how I acted in there. I just- I just didn't wanna believe that-"

"Andre. It's ok. I understand. I would have done the same thing if I were in your position."

"Please tell me that you'll beat this thing. I would hate to lose you. Especially like-"

"Stop. I'm not going anywhere. I made a promise to myself and to all of you that I'm not gonna let this cancer beat me. Im gonna beat it. No matter what I have to do I'm gonna fight until I can't."

That's when Prince jumped in.

"Then do the treatments. Take the chemo." He said.

I looked at him like he was crazy. I had already told him that I didn't want to do it and I gave him my valid reasons but he still didn't want to hear it.

"Prince you know why I don't want to."

"I know but we want you to. I-I want you to."

"Prince that may be so but you are about to fly out to Japan in three weeks. You won't even be here! Why take the treatments if you won't be here to help me."

"I will do what I can while I'm on tour but I want you to beat this thing and get better."

"Why so if it doesn't work you won't feel guilty about moving on?"

"Regan. Why would you say something like that?"

"Because Prince you acted like I was never gonna find out and I did! When you love someone you don't treat them like they don't exist! You have no idea how much you broke my heart!"

His face had immediately admitted his guilt and he was ready to just give in and tell me everything. All I had to to was wait for the right time to get him to open up to me.

  "Alright. Let's go and talk about this." He said taking my hand in his.

He led me back into the small room and closed the door behind him and locking it so that nobody could walk in.

  "What do you want me to tell you?" He asked as he sat on top of one of the tables.

  "I want you to tell me the truth. Do you still want this. Do you still want us to be....well....us."

He wasn't ready to answer that question but he knew that since his secret was out he didn't have much of an option. After he chose his words carefully he finally gave an answer.

  "Regan you know how much I love you. There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do for you but-"

  "But what? You're ashamed of me?"

  "No! Regan god no! Why would I be?"

  "Because I'm not as talented as you hoped I'd be. I'm not a flexible Spanish dancer with a motive."

  "What makes you think that she really has a motive?" He scoffed at me as he rolled his eyes.

  "Prince she's sixteen looking for a payout. You don't think that's motive enough. You can't possibly be falling for a girl half your age!"

  "You wouldn't understand Regan."

  "What wouldn't I understand Prince? That's she's there for you when I'm not?"

  "It's not like that!"

  "Then what is it like! You can be there for her but you can't be there for me? You've really changed up a lot since she's come into the picture."

  "Are you sure it's me who's changed?"

  "Oh I'm for damn sure it's you! The Prince I remember told me that he would never hurt me ever. Not even with words. Remember that? You made promises to love me forever!"

  "Regan I do love you and I always will! Things have just been different between us! I want you to be happy and what good would we be together if I'm always gone and I can't be with you all the time. You know I'm going through this contract shit with the label and I don't want you focusing so much on that. Especially now that......"

  "What? That I'm dying?"

  "I don't wanna be the one to stress you out. It's better that we just make this thing a clan break. I don't want you worrying so much about me when I'm away. I know that you need time to heal and beat this thing. I know you can do it. I can't be the one to cause you heartbreak when you're already going through too much. That's how much I love you."

My eyes fell away from his face and onto the ring that I wore on my finger since the day he gave it to me.

  "So then that's it. There is no us?" I asked him sadly still eyeing the ring.

  "There will always be an us. Just.....not like how we want it to be."

I understood that this was bond to happen and he was doing it for my own good and well being but at the same time although I agree with him the break up still hurts. No matter how much he tries to soften the blow the thought of knowing that there is no longer an us is painful. He noticed as a tear or two fell from my eye and wiped it away.

  "I don't want you thinking that I'm doing this because I don't love you. I'm doing this because I don't want to add on to the pain of being sick. I'm still gonna be here for you trough everything."

He gave me a kiss on the cheek and pulled away slowly.

  "Smile for me mama. I'm still here." He whispered to me.

Our eyes locked and I could feel my heart beat increasing the longer I fell into his gaze. His eyes were so entrancing that I lost all thoughts about what had just transpired between us. The sudden urge to kiss him took over and I went for it. Our first real since since I've been home was now about to be our last.