AU
In which Taylor and Adam are adopting a baby girl
Taylor's AU
In which Taylor and Adam are adopting a baby girl
Taylor's POV
"Adam do you think she'll love me as if I were her real mom?" I ask as we sit in the waiting room of the maternity ward, waiting for the birth.
It's not an everyday thing to adopt a baby, but after three miscarries and two rounds of failed IVF's, I don't think either of us wants to go through anymore of 'trying'.
But it's the nerves that are getting to me. I know that what we're doing is right, I can feel it in me that this is right. I just, I just don't know if she'll love us.
A few months ago, Adam was talking to one of his colleagues about the last failed IVF and as he was explaining that we really wanted a baby, his colleague, John, was telling us how his wife, Anne and daughter, Maddie, were trying to find a couple for Maddie's baby that was due on the 13th of October. We've known this family for a long time, had even gone to a few of their family barbecues, but we had never would have ever thought that they would have been comfortable enough to give us this opportunity. As soon as Adam found out that they hand wanted us to adopt the baby, he came straight home and told me. I was more than happy. I was finally becoming a mom.
Today was was exactly October 13th and Maddie was in labor. We got the call around 2:00 this afternoon during a late lunch of pizza, having our last hoorah as a childless couple.
The paper work took months to fill out, then having surprise visits from a social worker that Maddie's mom had insured me that they were just doing their job for the adoption agency, and then we started the nursery. We did white glitter walls with elephants everywhere. She has brown furniture with a very comfortable rocking chair to match. And a bunch of stuffed toys. The closet and drawers are full of clothes and diapers and everything else you could need for a baby. And then there's a bassinet set up in our room just for her first few months.
The only thing we hadn't done is pick out a name.
I wanted to name her either Addison Rose Wiles after Adam; Adam Richard Wiles, but I also wanted to name her Mackenzie Alison after Maddie and me. The naming was hard, but I decided that we'd name her when we see her.
The most hardest thing about this whole thing was my nerves. On the drive to the hospital, I realized that I'm potentially taking someone else's baby from them. The baby isn't mine. She didn't come from the love of Adam and I. She didn't spend the last nine months forming in my womb. I didn't get to feel her first kick or feel when she had hiccups. I didn't grow that bond with her. They say every baby automatically knows their mommy's voice, but the thing about it is she won't know mine because she isn't mine, biologically. How is it fair that a sixteen year old can get pregnant, but i can't? That is the real answer that I will never know.
Another thing that got to me; at the hospital, it's state law that the baby is not mine until she leaves with me, she is still under the custody of Maddie and her boyfriend, Zach. Which means that they are still her parents and they have three days after the birth to decide if they want to keep the baby. And even if they do decide that they don't want to keep her, after she's home with us, they have 90 days after the birth to decide if they want to take her back. They can swoop in after a month of us bonding with the baby and just take her away. Maddie has reassured me plenty of times that it won't happen, but the fear is still there. They have the rights to.
