Alone With Ross

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"I'm going out tonight, if you want to come that'd be cool, it's just going to be me and my boyfriend." My roommate Ashley was doing her makeup in the mirror, that also doubled as a closet door. I grimaced at the thought of third wheeling

"Uh, no, I'm fine, I'm still trying to settle in." I lied. I'm not exactly the best person to be around at the moment, it's not like she'd notice anyways, she's to wrapped up in her own world.

Or is that you? My subconscious asks.

"Alright, suit yourself, don't wait up for me." She grabbed her purse and left, leaving me by myself for the first time this week. And instantly I was bombarded with memories.

I remembered how soft and comfortable the bed was back at home, instead of this hard ass piece of styrofoam they gave me. I remembered having a private shower, instead of these damn co-ed bathrooms where you have to wear shower shoes.

But it's useless remembering things like that, because I'm here at Columbia, a school that has a 7% acceptance rate, I've beat the odds despite all the obstacles thrown my way.

I'm happy.

Or at least I'm trying to be.

It's been two weeks. He should've been home by now. Did he see all my things packed up? Was he angry? Did he even care?

He hasn't tried to contact me since I overheard his conversation with April. Everything just happened so quick that I still didn't have time to grieve my relationship with Ross. But I feel like tonight is the night for a funeral.

My head snapped towards the door as Ashley came bounding in. "Sorry I forgot my phone." She laughed. "Last chance, Caspian." She sang out and I was still sat on my bed.

What the heck. "Alright, let me get ready."

***
Ross' POV
"Spare change?" A husky bearded guy approached me as I was walking up to some kind of club. I searched through my pockets grabbing all that I had in them, ten bucks and a crap ton of change was bestowed to him and he graciously took it and hobbled back from where ever he came from.

My car had broken down about a mile back, and my phone was dead from using the GPS and I stupidly wasn't charging it as I was using it. It felt like midnight. I want nothing more than to just curl up in a warm bed and sleep for years to ignore this empty hole. But I kept on, because I need to go back home.

It was in the middle of my driving that I had began to question things, I mean, what if this is what was supposed to happen? What if she's supposed to move on, doing bigger and better things and I'm supposed to let her?

It hurts just thinking about it. I walked into this bar with every intention of going up there to ask to borrow the phone. But as soon as the guy asked me what I wanted, my mouth was moving before I had even thought about it, ordering a beer I didn't need I sat and drank, while my subconscious was screaming at me to stop, and the worst part of this is that my subconscious isn't even my voice. Like some kind of cruel joke Caspian's voice rings through my head telling me what a mistake I am making, I could picture her, sitting right next to me, crying, crying in the way only Caspian could cry, the way her tears would build up and up, until finally, Olympia has fallen. It was a beautiful sight, it hurt to watch, but I'm a sick fool who chooses the wrong things to gawk at.

I was four in, buzzed off of the beer, only to be sobered by my thoughts of her, again and again. In between my third and fourth drink I got my charger from the car and walked the full mile back just to order another one. And as my phone came back to life I was greeted with a symphony, missed calls and messages, mainly being from Vi but at the top I saw her name.