Alone With Ross

•15•

October 26th, 2011
Why is it so hot? Its fucking sweltering.

I cracked my eyes open to see Ross laying across me. His forehead has beads of sweat on it and his arms are around my waist like a snake as his head lays on my chest.

I look towards our alarm clock to see he's already missed 2nd period at school.

Panicking I pushed Ross to the side quickly making him roll off the bed and onto the hardwood floor.

"Shit, what the fuck was that for?" Ross groans as he rubs his head.

"Your late for school you dumb ass." He looked towards the clock and shrugged.

"Might as well stay home then." He got back up in my bed and pushed me over towards the wall.

" Its too fucking hit to be in the same bed." I shoved him back.

" Go put shorts on then, or better yet just sleep in your underwear." He smirked at me. Rolling my eyes I climbed over him and went into the closet to change into red volleyball shorts and I retied my hair up because it was a mess from sleep.

When I came out of the closet Ross was putting his shorts on.

"Why is it so hot? Its fucking October." I jumped onto the bed and almost bashed my head into the wall.

" I haven't shaved my legs in four days, so have fun feeling prickles." When Ross got into bed I rubbed my leg against his making him jerk back.

"Ew that's gross." Our legs were getting tangled as Ross kept dodging mine.

"Yours are worse so shut up." Our legs stopped moving as his thigh was in between my legs. And I got that feeling.

Not the one where you want to continue, but the feeling I got with Rider.

"R-Ross, can you move your leg?" He heard the distant tone in my voice and immediately moved his leg.

"I'm sorry, I-I wasn't thinking." I shook my head and sat up.

"No I'm sorry. I should just be able to get over it just fine. I did last time! What is so different?" I asked more towards myself.

"You didn't love him this time." Ross reached for my hand and rubbed circles with his thumb.

"I want to destroy that fucking shed." I said as I looked at our joined hands.

"Let's go then." I froze and looked him in the eyes.

"But its not mine." I looked back down shaking my head trying to get the idea out of my head.

"We don't use it anymore. And Vi's gone grocery shopping at the farmers market and that is at least until two." I looked at the click that read ten till eight.

"Okay."

•••

I had to change out of my shorts because its freezing out here. Me and Ross walked towards the small shed that was just a little bit bigger than a port-a-potty. I reached for the Handel but Ross stopped me.

"You don't have to go in there." I shook my head and continued on.

"I know. But I have to." I opened the door slowly to see what I've seen in my nightmares for the past month.

I walked in further to see my shredded clothing on the floor. I hugged the sides of my body remembering the numbing cold. My ears can remember the sounds of his groans as he violated me and I remember the noise my pinkie made when he snapped it. I looked down at my crooked pinkie and shook my head sadly. I put my face in my hands.

"What did I possibly do to deserve this? Why was it me, why didn't you fight him off when you so easily could." My old thoughts were returning.

"Cass stop." Ross begged. I walked back out of the shed and went straight to Ross who enveloped me into a hug.

"Why did it have to be me Ross?" I said into his chest as I cried.

"I'm sorry he did this to you, you didn't deserve this." He hugged me tighter. "Please just go crazy just this once. Don't hold it in, this is your chance to let it all out." He places something heavy in my hand. I look down to see the head of a sledge hammer. I grabbed the handle and walk over slowly. I was a foot away from the front of it. I hefted it up over my shoulder and let it out.

I brought the sledge hammer down repeatedly until my arms were aching and the only thing coming from my mouth were cuss words. I hit one of the pillars making the roof start to collapse. But Ross grabbed me before it could fall on top of me.

Feeling faint I sat on the grass and looked at my hands that were red from gripping the handle to hard.

"Are you okay?" Ross crouched on the ground next to me and rubbed my back.

"Can you carry me to the bed please?" My voice sounded off even to him.

"Yeah, but what happened? I expected you to be jumping for joy right now." He picked me up easily.

"I-I don't know. I feel like I'm about to throw up." I covered my mouth and held my stomach trying to calm myself from Ross' swaying.

" When was the last time you ate Cass?" My eyes widened in realization.

" I-I haven't had a full meal since, since the court date. I've mostly been eating fruit gummies." I groan as he sets me down on the bed.

"Do you think you can hold anything down?" My vision was getting blurry. I couldn't comprehend the rest of what Ross was saying he started shaking me trying to talk to me. But my vision went black. Landing me in the dreamland with a sledge hammer and stupid gummy fruit.