Waiting (a pernico fic)

Chapter 20

AN: this chapter is triggering so tread lightly my puff pastries

Nico

Nico couldn't get the look of utter defeat Will had out of his head. Will had wanted Percy to hit him. Why? What was even sicker than that was that Nico had wanted Percy to hit him too. That thought made him shudder and he immediately banished the twisted pleasure he'd felt at Will hurting out of his head. It was bad enough that Will had told Percy to hit him again, Nico didn't want to think of what would have happened if Percy wasn't so damned good, all the way to the core.

Luckily, Annabeth came by shortly thereafter, and they spent most of the time she was there playing a long game of CAH. It got Nico out of his head for a while and it made Percy laugh, a sound he thouroughly enjoyed.
By the time they ended the game, it was close to midnight and she only hung around long enough after to hug them and say her farewells before running off into the night, clutching a borrowed flashlight.
With her gone and the air odd between him and Percy because of earlier, Nico simply announced he wanted first shower and trotted off to the bathroom without looking at his boyfriend.

Percy

As Percy set out his things so he had them handy once he showered, he thought about the change he'd seen in Nico earlier. The way he'd looked at Will after Percy hit him was something he couldn't quite place. Obviously, there was horror because Will was letting Percy beat him, but there was also something like... curiousity. Like he'd wanted to know why Will was allowing this. Percy was fairly certain he knew why.
He saw how Will looked at Nico, almost predatorily, and his twisted mind probably thought he'd win Nico's trust with pity. Well, Percy wasn't going to allow that. There was no way he was going to let Will get his hooks in Nico after all that had happened. Will wasn't good for Nico, not at all, not if the last three months had shown Percy anything. The last thing Nico needed was that... that psychopath in his life.

Just then, Nico came out of the bathroom, his hair still damp. "Hey, babe," Nico said off-handedly as he flopped unceremoniously onto their bed. Percy smiled small. Yep, he was definitely keeping Will away from Nico. "Hey. I won't be long, kay?" Nico nodded and watched him go in.
He showered quickly and changed, stepping out to see Nico still awake, obviously waiting for him. Percy smiled and strode over, climbing in behind him. "Hey again."
"Hey, again," Nico replied, turning in Percy's arms to press his face into Percy's chest. They stayed that way a while until Percy broke and asked the smaller boy about what had happened.
Nico was quiet a bit before saying quietly, "He wanted you to beat him up."
Percy had had a feeling that that was what stuck with Nico. So Percy said the first thing he could think of, "He wanted to be the victim." Percy held Nico closer. "He wanted to make me the bad guy." Which Percy believed was true, Will had wanted Percy to become the monster. But that wasn't the only reason Will had done that. Percy forced the thought away and held his angel. After a bit, Nico asked, "Are you sure?"
"Absolutely."

Will

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Will punctuated each thought with a smack of his forehead against an empty tree. Of course Percy wouldn't have beaten him with Nico standing there.
But he deserved it.
He'd hurt Nico.
He'd hit him.
He'd pulled on his stitches.
He'd made him have panic attacks.
He deserved it.
And yet Percy had walked away, with Nico in hand.
He was too good to fight someone who wouldn't fight back.
Maybe Percy is better for Nico than I am.
Will angrily dismissed that thought. Percy was not better than him.
Suddenly, he stopped beating his head against the tree. Wait.
He deserved to hurt. Why not do it himself?
Nico laying there bleeding flashed through his mind and, though that thought was painful, it gave him an idea.
Wildly, Will rummaged through his pockets and found a scalpal he'd stashed there absentmindedly. Perfect.
Running the steel against his skin, he hissed at the sharp pain, then suddenly sighed as mind-numbing endorphins made his head buzz. So this is why he did it... He repeated the motion and sank to sit in the grass. The feeling was more than pleasant.
As a doctor, he understood why self-harmers did what they did, but it was different to experience it first-hand. The rush was something he'd never experienced before and he gulped hard as the blood loss started to make his head spin.
Satisfied for now, he rumaged around and found a roll of bandage in his pockets, expertly wrapping his forearm and securing it before returning to his cabin to sleep.

AN: gah dayum Will, chill tf out.
On a more serious note, I need to put that I in no way condone, entertain, or promote self-harm. As a former self-harmer, I get how serious it is and I don't really enjoy writing about it because it brings back memories, but in this, Will is a bit off his rocker. He wants to connect with Nico in any way he can and his sick little brain is like 'monkey see, monkey do'. I felt that it conveyed how desperate Will was to have something to bond with Nico over.
SO if you're thinkin' about it, don't. I love you.
Anyway, I shall see you all next chapter.
˜Tom